<&>Wellington Corpus of Spoken New Zealand English Version One <&>Copyright 1998 School of Linguistics & Applied Language Studies <&>Victoria University of Wellington <&>side one <&>3:50 no well no laughs but um i don't know how seriously to take it i don't know um <,,> sounds <.>like i mean i don't <&>4:00 know anything about jack body apart from <,> several things we won't discuss now laughs <{><[>laughs <[>laughs they'll write that in <{><[>word no as um sniffs filthy snigger or something like that <[>in joke laughs <,,> mm i don't know how seriously are they <.>ex are you <.>sp i <.>mean oh well people <{><[>word <[>i mean i can just see everyone making <.>laugh laughy videos no no <.>that some of them are DEAD serious like they're are they they're gonna <.>go they're gonna go out <.>and and reveal their little psyches <&>deliberately pronounced as pisychees um just like <{1><[1>mad and that's gonna be torturous black and white <{2><[2>grainy and laughs yeah <{3><[3>so <[1>laughs <[2>oh <[3>these people <{><[>take themselves so seriously tut <[>coughs well yes <.>but yeah mm <,> er the one we saw the other day was <,> clears throat well i think it started out with um a film about me written on <&>5:00 a bit of paper and that sort of sounded like ours already laughs um um <.>only er this was <.>s sitting on um a leopard skin jock strap or something and then there was a girlie <{><[><.>getting <[><.>s something tasteful like <{><[>that <[>getting dressed up <.>and and putting a wig on and it was all pretty um i don't know it was supposed to be meaningful or something there was a interview with an old fuddy duddy who said i've known her since she's been my granddaughter <.>and mm mm clears throat well i don't think we'll be able to get you any character witnesses simon laughs thank you for <{><[>that vote of confidence sniffs <[>laughs well if your true inner being is amusing then you should make an amusing video surely <{><[>yeah <[>so long as er you don't <.>look i think if you look like you're taking the piss out of the whole thing <,> then it won't be appreciated very much eh yeah but if <{1><[1>you just show a humorous aspect of yourself with some cutting satire on <.>a <{2><[2>on a level <[1>coughs <[2>cutting satire well we've got to <{><[>level them up on the video <[><.>we <.>we we'll <.>be laughs we'll be lucky laughs <&>6:00 the thing I'M worried <.>about i mean i'm quite happy to go away and make an amusing video but the um voc what am i going to do for the music well it's essentially up to you yeah i know but um um it's <.>got you've got to integrate it and it doesn't <.>s i mean oh <,,> exhales i don't know what sort of music do you want to put on it <{><[>word <[>well <.>that that's the thing i can put anything on it clears throat <.>i <.>e cos i mean the way we're looking at it is from a point of view of the music enHANcing it like sort of like chase music or <{1><[1><.>so inane um <&>sings tune simon's life is a circus <{2><[2>type thing um yeah but <.>they i think this concept <.>sh that er think this concept <.>sh that er um that jack wants is that it should <,,><&>3 <&>sighs it should <&>7:00 be integral an integral part of it but <.>i i don't feel voc um the thing <.>is er that <.>w that would be fine but um er that doesn't mean anything for me like i don't think i'm ever going to write music for films or anything like that and <.>i and <.>as as well as <.>any <.>i well i <,,> what's the word laughs as far as anything else is concerned i wouldn't be able <.>to <,,> wouldn't be able to write five minutes worth of music <.>so <[1>laughs <[2>laughs yeah yeah <.>in in such a short time limit cos <{><[>laughs <[>it's too long well for me <{><[>yes <[>the creative processes well no for a film music composer it'd be three seconds work but clears throat for simon who just agonises over every little note then um <,,> yeah <.>s um well i thought <.>of i thought of a couple of things but do you want to sort of discuss <.>the yeah <{><[>go ahead but you've <.>got <[>video word the details the nuts and bolts <.>and you've got to start cos <.>it's you're you oh <.>i i was <.>ju forgotten how <.>to i don't know <&>8:00 i want to do things like um <,> like er really tacky and um laughs <&>simon's friends in <.>a in <.>a on <.>a written on a bit of cardboard <.>and and with jonathan going <&>gestures laughs <{1><[1>and inane things like that <.>and and er sort of <{2><[2>like deep personal revealing details like sexuality word <[1>laughs <[2>sniffs laughs picture of a <{><[>woman thumbs up <[>laughs laughs um laughs <{><[>laughs <[>and that's really you yes yeah laughs laughs i'm afraid so inhales <.>y why don't we just um splice together bits of old pornos and <{><[>word <[>laughs oh we could use their tacky music that's <.>wh that music <.>is oops i don't want to get into <.>th <{><[>laughs that's recorded by stereo <[>laughs laughs tacky music the music is we used <.>to we used to laugh along to <.>th <.>our our teacher would be diverted as <.>the to listen to <.>the i mean fuck word i remember a certain video laughs where they <&>9:00 had one like three minute piece of music it was the same <{><[>piece of music word over and over again <[>laughs laughs god oh that was <.>quite but they never credit the composer at the end i wondered why not but maybe it's just the plastic music that you buy for lifts and things yeah i think so made by a machine just creep around behind the supermarket <{><[>laughs <[>tape recording laughs so if you're ever in countdown and you see a big boom <{><[>coming <[>yeah <,,><&>3 <{><[>tut like word <[>well you <.>cou i mean you could do that but you should have a purpose for everything you do mm i was <.>only <.>b mm yeah exhales making a two minute selfportrait video is <.>just or five minutes or whatever it was <.>where where would i start i don't know where to start well you'll have to write lists and other things like that mm get it started tut i quite fancy the idea of the inspired genius laughs but <.>i i have a variation on <&>10:00 that which is sort of me sitting at the piano going voc and think of a brilliant idea and playing some really wonderful music <.>like which no one would recognise of course but some really stirring great music <{><[>and then and and then then um and then thinking mm <[>yeah laughs <{><[>laughs <[>and going to the piano and going <&>sings tune in silly voice laughs thinking no that wasn't it <{1><[1>thinking again and then <.>the think would be <{2><[2><&>sings tune <[1>laughs <[2><&>sings tune yeah and <.>then then doing the um sesame street thing with the head on the piano yeah i still think that the idea of the um the genius <.>of er laughs emergence of <.>a of a striking new <{><[>genius <.>is laughs is simply too good to um sniffs <[>laughs well you've got the dark and sickly pallor yeah word room word low life mm sickly pallor <,> voc well we could go over to the commons <.>and if we had the angles of the camera right we could make <.>the <.>it the commons look really seedy <.>and <{><[>word laughs <[>laughs word <&>11:00 um we could <.>have you like leaning over a pool table yes simon getting his hands dirty in the search for creative um impulses <.>and yeah mixing with the scum of society laughs <{><[>laughs i thought it was <[>and he's never even been home yeah yeah my <{><[>flatmate <.>played played the most of the scum in society <[>laughs laughs <{><[>amazing <[>good laughs well mm <{><[>laughs <[>laughs there's no more bugger sniffs um yeah well so <{><[>laughs <[>laughs jonathan was exhausted no it's not exhausted yet no um well not until we actually think of something to put ON your video <,> what <.>exactly what essential features of yourself do you want to bring <{><[>out <[>none that's the thing exhales <{><[><.>well <[>i'm not interested in revealing myself on video it seems just the <.>most i mean i'm laughs unhappy enough with my little personality as it is without <&>12:00 showing everybody else laughs <{1><[1>maybe we could um just <{2><[2>i don't know symbolically show your um <[1>mm <[2>laughs sad all his little sickness <.>your your <{><[>laughs no i was going to <.>say <[>laughs like a <.>p silhouette of penises running around your massive problems with selfimage could do with that sort <.>of laughs laughs yeah thanks jonathan you're not supposed to know <{><[>laughs <[>laughs um <{><[>laughs well if you're <.>go if you <.>can't if you <.>like if you <.>like if you can't think of um specific features then you could do it like um a day in the life of simon burgess and let the day in the life show the specific features for itself which is a very convenient mechanism for <.>p you know just sort of doing whatever the hell you want to but it gives it an order which you can always fall back on if you don't quite know what to do after lunch <[>laughs word laughs he said acting word i think i could really go word there simon does EVERYTHING for the whole day simon cleans <{><[><.>simon laughs word laughs word <[>laughs simon looking <.>enthusias simon does no <&>13:00 composing and that's <.>why <{><[>laughs <[>laughs mm clears throat no but think i mean it <.>w simon in the creative processes and you could be cooking <.>and this is simon being creative <.>and <.>then then a shot of a few bars of music composed yeah great <&>moans only it doesn't work like that simon and the vegetable operetta only it <.>w it would be like a picture <.>of er an empty stage continuously and a note reading go away <{><[>laughs come back laughs <[>laughs tut well that's one thing you can do yeah you <.>c like see everything in <.>the in the course of a day <,> <{><[>or <.>it's <.>sh word <[>i mean <.>that's relatively convenient way of ordering it especially as the night comes down <.>or it's the next morning arriving <{><[>word <[>we draw a veil over the unpleasant scene that follows yeah yeah no but i mean you could have some startling conclusions <{1><[1>to the sunset or <{2><[2>something tacky like that sun sets over the top of everton hall's chimneys <[1>laughs <[2>oh no no <&>14:00 yeah with a belch of green smoke laughs simon is once again hard at work preparing for the next day's sleep <{><[>laughs exhausted <[>laughs <,,><&>4 tut either that or you could have a series of gags <{><[>that isn't such a bad idea <[>laughs oh <,,><&>4 mm yeah <.>that that once again is the <,> problem of um <,,> the sound mm <,> <{><[>but <.>that what about <.>this <[>i mean the only sound i've thought of is the what i said before about the sound of the piano yeah <,,> what about two minutes of interminable snuffling <{><[>laughs <[>laughs excellent laughs interminable snuffling which side of me is that <{><[>laughs you'd like to explain <[>laughs <&>15:00 um the public side laughs oh thanks inhales well the private side's more of a slurp oh yuk <{><[>laughs <[>laughs not that i have <{1><[1>seen the private side <.>i i wish to <{2><[2>assure you transcript writer <[1>i don't know if this <.>is laughs <[2>laughs oh god <,> oh sniffs this could be thoroughly <.>embarr <{><[>laughs oh i'll i'll try sort of going at it from the point of view of not not wanting to reveal anything of my innermost um um weaknesses will be revealed and it'll also show that i'm an empty cardboard figure laughs <[>laughs laughs and i'll blow myself away to put a fitting end to it that's the that's a conclusion for us no but that that's great think of <{><[>it <,> laughs <[>laughs oh thank you <{1><[1>great i see <.>y you're <.>w sacrifice all in the <{2><[2>creative art <&>name says word laughs ultimate um yes god laughs <{3><[3>embarrassment <[1>word <[2>laughs <[3>no but but <.>th think of the fun you could <{><[>have like <[>you would sell this to a film <{><[>festival wouldn't you <[><.>s triple triple irony that videos of the same length same yeah we could have yeah hamish in a dress laughs laughs oh no you're not seeing that side of me no oops laughs we're as queer can be laughs inhales oh god <,> we'll make up a few laughs word tut yeah no but things like things for the um <,> tut the dark ironies could produce of um having yourself as a a word that's yeah <{><[>that's word <[>only word word of it like that word only filmed a little bit <,,><&>3 <{><[>but no <[><.>i i'm just the greatest guy they wouldn't laugh word word laughs but it's not such a silly idea <{><[>like it if your <.>i the idea is your personality is that you don't want to show it to anyone else well then that's part of your personality in itself <[>mm yeah i know laughs so it's worth exploring mm that could be the basis and that could be some of the difficulties you experience with art the need to provide a structural basis behind which you can express your innermost thoughts that's that's great acting laughs <&>17:04