<&>Wellington Corpus of Spoken New Zealand English Version One <&>Copyright 1998 School of Linguistics & Applied Language Studies <&>Victoria University of Wellington <&>side one <&>6:18 i never even said anything bad they just drew their own opinions but did you when they were <.>y you know a <.>f <.>y a <{><[>year or so back <[>nah nah you didn't discuss things <{><[>with them <[>nah my life yeah and they just fell into place if they didn't like it THAT'S when i picked it up because they didn't like it okay <,,> but it feels all right for me mm i mean <,> nah i mean even about <.>their even about bill never told them anything mm <.>so <.>a and i think that's honest <{><[>it's what happened to me not what's happened to them <[>mm mm so when they went home they had no hangups <.>no <,> and what <.>a a monster he was and all this <,> <{><[>which was fairer <&>7:00 <[>mm no i <.>didn't i didn't used to talk like that to the kids until bradley and i broke up mm and from then onwards i was trying to be careful to explain what was happening so that they didn't take on <.>board yeah THEY didn't <.>start think that they'd done <{><[>something <[>i know what you're saying i know what you're <{><[>saying word <[>and that's when that pattern started of justifying my actions <{><[>to them <[>it seemed like everything though eh yeah yeah never mind mm it's <{><[>no problem <[>i'm going to say something cos i actually don't appreciate being bad buzzed by her like that i don't feel very comfortable either no no eye contact it was like <&>gestures? laughs yeah it was horrible <{><[>mm <[>was it <,> no you don't have to put up with it no <,,> no i'd much rather address it and then if she wants to do that well that's fine but i won't go and <.>have i won't make the mistake of going and sitting at the table where she's having <{><[><,> morning tea er lunch <[>mm <,> mm <,,><&>4 hey um yeah i feel it too but there's <&>8:00 nothing um <,,> that she doesn't already know i mean hey leave her to it mm just tell her er lay off i don't want to <{><[>hear about it <[>mm mm get on with her own life mm you're not involving her in it well i'm not judging her for HER decisions either mm <,,> well she <.>doesn't i don't think she's <.>even that's even occurred to her no but <.>the you know casey was one thing this morning but mm pandora surprises me actually i thought she'd actually got a step past that because she was saying a wee while ago that my <.>decisions it's MY life and she was actually saying to casey leave mum alone it's actually her life quite contrary to that and then when it laughs comes to the point she actually can't see it through at all yeah never mind <{1><[1>that's the last thing you need <&>9:00 round about now <,> you <{2><[2>will never need it you've <{3><[3>had your time with it <[1>so then i will say <.>s <[2>yeah <[3>no yeah you know <.>y <.>th it's all right for to a certain point where you discussed everything and that's fine and it helped them i mean it felt like that <.>wasn't them personally to blame <{><[>crying <[>mm and a lot of that even telling them you would've let them off the hook and harboured it yourself so mm either way <,> can't win yeah no i'm gonna speak to her AND casey <,,> and say <.>casey <.>i if SHE finds it <{><[>all so difficult <[>CASEY will say i <.>can't i'm not doing nothing which she isn't laughs <{><[>word <[>no no i'm going to talk to her though i'll say if <.>sh if she finds it so difficult well then she can shift round to bradley's until she finds a flat <,> she has PLENTY of alternatives and you're not asking pandora to have contact? no well that's all she said that you know she said oh it's <,> i know it's mum's life but you know <&>10:00 it's the kids <,,> it's all her still judging though yeah no give you some credit mm oh mm <{1><[1>actually gets a bit sharper with girls and they <{2><[2><.>all boys are a bit more i <{3><[3>don't know <[1>yeah <[2><.>I <[3>yeah it <.>was even ned said you know casey does seem to make a <.>grea a big issue out of everything and <,,> <{><[><.>a and is quick to <.>als yes no NO <[>ever so nasty eh <{><[>boys aren't <[>and quick to see the um tut <&>sighs oh absolutely on the lookout like with the binoculars for anything that's not a hundred percent in <.>her to her <{><[>liking and will <.>n not see a whole day of the most amazing interaction totally discounts that <[>mm mm and then one silly comment or <.>one not eating properly at the table or something like that and <.>there's you know she'll claps boom <.>she's she's <{><[>you know <[>i'm actually amazed <{><[>at YOUR strength <[>and she's actually like <.>it at what YOUR strength today last week the <.>wee cos you know <.>th <{><[><.>th <.>you <[>i'm NOT bowing down to it yeah but i mean a month ago you would have been shattered yeah and they <{><[><.>would've she would've been aware of that <[>yeah <.>and and i <.>only my only worry now is how the boys are coping and they're actually <.>coping <.>i i'm with them all the time they're coping fine <,,> the <{><[><.>c <.>b you know they've been playing cards having a hell of a nice time they're <.>g down playing tennis and <[>mm yeah well <{><[>when you're happy see that's the secret with boys when you're happy they're happy <[>being silly and fun fighting round the house <.>y yeah <.>th exactly and if I'M coping <{><[><.>they're they're perfectly happy <[>if you're upset well <.>then then they get <{><[>all upset too <[>yep yep voc yeah <{><[><.>girls <[>but casey <.>is is standing RIGHT outside the group she has nothing to do with the house whether vinnie's there or not mind you mm that actually hasn't changed either cos when he's away she still doesn't come in and BE part <&>12:00 of the group she comes in criticises matthew tells the kids what to do <{><[>and then leaves again yeah <,> very little contact with anybody just very superior and very judgemental and i'm actually really ready for her to leave home <[>and word mm yep i don't <{><[>know <[>that's fine yeah girls <.>are <,> boys do seem as a generalisation to actually be <.>more go with the flow as long as their little world isn't being <{><[>upset they seem to be able to shut off more <[>mm MM and just go with whatever's happening <,,> and <.>j my brother rang and he's found the same with <,> his girls too julia who's now about <,> tut seventeen jim said is very mouthy and very quick to say what she thinks about things <.>and and things and the <.>thirte the one who's matthew's age who's <.>just <,> oh she's six months older than matt and she's at college just started college has now got a sixth form boyfriend she's wanting to go to parties where there's drugs um i mean jim and marj are really conservative mhm REALLY <{1><[1>conservative and they had a really easy run with warwick and rachel and it was like sam and i were the bad ones of the family and our lives are total messes and jim had these absolutely perfect kids and <.>they he's had these thousands of dollars worth of ponies for them and they've travelled over the country to shows <.>he the kids go on these flash motorbikes and motocross and oh he's <.>been he's on the board of trustees at the schools you know <.>he's he's the model <{2><[2>person up there and got the big job at <&>name of company and gina they're just about pulling their hair out she's only in the third form <.>and and one of the kids got her drink spiced at this party <{3><[3>the <.>other the other day gina's friend and gina said I didn't have any but her friend was rolling drunk at thirteen with all these sixth <&>14:00 formers so jim's letting her go between eight and ten thirty sort of thing and everything's gonna be okay they go and pick her up at ten thirty from these parties but they don't know what to do because they're scared <.>if their friends around them who say no the kids can't go out the girls are climbing out the windows so they feel if they let the kids go out for <.>a gina go out for a little while <[1>coughs <[2>mm <[3>laughs <{><[>yeah <[>it'll be okay laughs funny life eh laughs yeah oh god laughs i've <.>got talking about girls <.>i've i've found them <.>really oh <,,> agony <,,><&>3 i think about it now but <&>sighs <,> <.>it <.>at at the time it was <.>r really hard because she was um <,> she just didn't talk <.>sh <&>15:00 she just ignored everybody <,> she <.>w <.>and <.>i just the way she tossed her head or er walked through the kitchen and that oh dad's home says lorraine <,,> just a look like this you know at lorraine please she says and she's down the room doesn't <.>ma <.>i it doesn't matter if she misses tea just any contact like that SHE WAS TERRIBLE word it's just not a joke twice like that eh voc <&>hits something er well my patience oh i mean i <.>didn't i didn't hit her or anything but i felt like it mm and i <{><[>got itchy hands eh laughs <[>did you word ? yeah laughs laughs i can't believe one of my own could be so rude it's THAT it's the rudeness i wouldn't tolerate it and she wouldn't like me to treat a mate like that but it was okay this guy happens <&>16:00 to be feeding me <,> doing things like that <.>a and overlook <,> give up telly for me that's not important he'll go to bed early so he's not out in the <.>wa out <.>in i mean he DID all that <,,> oh no later about time they were put back in their place that's why children are there and parents are here i know now so things like that don't happen but hey you just treat them like mature young adults like their dad mm <{><[>let them have an opinion <,> their opinion voc oh half the thing <.>i i mean i didn't want to HEAR all the things they have an opinion on it's none of their business <,,> i created that yeah so i believe in speaking up for yourself no but i'm pleased now <,,> josh can say anything he likes give him the fact he is <&>17:00 an adult yeah but he stuffs up too <[>but they don't act like it mm but i won't have a kid judging him mm whatever hurt come the point is cos <.>i I was hurt personally took it upon myself inhales voc i'm a wimp but word she's come a long way now but i think she's more clued up that if <.>she's she plays <.>it plays up or if she's rude she won't get the money SHE wants to do this do that i don't care whatever reason she's doing it <{><[>mm <[>i just won't have her being rude mm <,> is she doing it much now nah that's what's so good about it mm <&>loud whistling noise over next turn and she really loves school now and she says to the um she was saying to josh and i the other day that she's er she said she feels good about her school cert <{><[>fantastic <[>see? but that's a change yeah <{><[>a total change <[>we've had nothing to do with this no i mean um <,> yeah and her <.>a attitude towards it <&>18:00 <,,> since i told her she's got her life back i don't want it laughs i thought i <.>had you know had to be in control and comfort them and keep them safe and all this and doing so i actually created <.>a <.>a <.>a a leech you know like a parasite just hanging on to me <.>all i created her like that so i didn't blame her totally mm but at the end of the day eh come ON so i did that i did that but you don't have to live like that and that's where casey's at casey's so CONFUSED mm cos all <.>th er game rules have changed but still that's not to excuse her behaviour that's what i'm saying mm <&>18:45