<B CEPLAY2A>
<Q E2 XX COME SHAKESP>
<N MERRY WIVES>
<A SHAKESPEARE WILLIAM>
<C E2>
<O 1570-1640>
<M X>
<K X>
<D ENGLISH>
<V PROSE>
<T DRAMA COMEDY>
<G X>
<F X>
<W SCRIPT>
<X MALE>
<Y 20-40>
<H HIGH PROF>
<U X>
<E X>
<J INTERACTIVE>
<I INFORMAL>
<Z X>
<S SAMPLE X>


[^SHAKESPEARE, WILLIAM.
TEXT:  THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR.
MR. WILLIAM SHAKESPEARES COMEDIES,
HISTORIES, & TRAGEDIES.
A FACSIMILE EDITION PREPARED BY H. KOEKERITZ, 
WITH AN INTRODUCTION BY C. T. PROUTY.
LONDON: GEOFFREY CUMBERLEGE AND OXFORD
UNIVERSITY PRESS AND NEW HAVEN: YALE
UNIVERSITY PRESS, 1955.
PP. 43.C2.6  - 47.C2.8   (SAMPLE 1)
PP. 54.C1.16 - 55.C2.32  (SAMPLE 2)^]

<S SAMPLE 1>
<P 43.C2>
[} (\ACTUS SECUNDUS. SCOENA PRIMA.\) }]

(^Enter Mistris^) Page, (^Mistris^) Ford, (^Master^) Page,      #
(^Master^)
Ford, Pistoll, Nim, Quickly, Host, Shallow.

(^Mist. Page.^) What, haue scap'd Loue-letters in the
holly day-time of my beauty, and am I now a subiect
for them? let me see?

(^Aske me no reason why I loue you, for though Loue vse Reason
for his precisian, hee admits him not for his Counsailour:
you are not yong, no more am I: goe to then, there's simpathie:
you are merry, so am I: ha, ha, then there's more simpathie:
you loue sacke, and so do I: would you desire better simpathie?
Let it suffice thee, (Mistris Page) at the least if the Loue of
Souldier can suffice, that I loue thee: I will not say pitty    #
mee,
'tis not a Souldier-like phrase; but I say, loue me:
By me, thine owne true Knight, by day or night:
Or any kinde of light, with all his might,
For thee to fight. Iohn Falstaffe.^)

What a (^Herod^) of (^Iurie^) is this? O wicked, wicked world:
One that is well-nye worne to peeces with age
To show himselfe a yong Gallant? What an vnwaled
Behauiour hath this Flemish drunkard pickt (with
The Deuills name) out of my conuersation, that he dares
In this manner assay me? why, hee hath not beene thrice
In my Company: what should I say to him? I was then
Frugall of my mirth: (heauen forgiue mee:) why Ile
Exhibit a Bill in the Parliament for the putting downe
of men: how shall I be reueng'd on him? for reueng'd I
will be? as sure as his guts are made of puddings.
(^Mis Ford.^) (^Mistris Page^) , trust me, I was going to your
house.
(^Mis Page.^) And trust me, I was comming to you: you
looke very ill.
(^Mis. Ford.^) Nay, Ile nere beleeue [^EDITION: beleeee^] that; #
I haue to shew
you to the contrary.
(^Mis. Page.^) 'Faith but you doe in my minde.
(^Mis. Ford.^) Well: I doe then: yet I say, I could shew
you to the contrary: O Mistris (^Page^) , giue mee some
counsaile.
(^Mis. Page.^) What's the matter, woman?
(^Mi. Ford.^) O woman: if it were not for one trifling respect,
I could come to such honour.
(^Mi. Page.^) Hang the trifle (woman) take the honour:
what is it? dispence with trifles: what is it?
(^Mi. Ford.^) If I would but goe to hell, for an eternall
moment, or so: I could be knighted.
(^Mi. Page.^) What thou liest? Sir (^Alice Ford^) ? these
Knights will hacke, and so thou should not alter the article
of thy Gentry.
(^Mi. Ford.^) Wee burne day-light: heere, read, read:
perceiue how I might bee knighted, I shall thinke the
worse of fat men, as long as I haue an eye to make difference
of mens liking: and yet hee would not sweare:
<P 44.C1>
praise womens modesty: and gaue such orderly and welbehaued 
reproofe to al vncomelinesse, that I would haue
sworne his disposition would haue gone to the truth of
his words: but they doe no more adhere and keep place
together, then the hundred Psalms to the tune of Greensleeues:
What tempest (I tro:) threw this Whale, (with
so many Tuns of oyle in his belly) a'shoare at Windsor?
How shall I bee reuenged on him? I thinke the best way
were, to entertaine him with hope, till the wicked fire
of lust haue melted him in his owne greace: Did you euer
heare the like? 
(^Mis. Page.^) Letter for letter; but that the name of
(^Page^) and (^Ford^) differs: to thy great comfort in this     #
mystery
of ill opinions, heere's the twyn-brother of thy Letter:
but let thine inherit first, for I protest mine neuer
shall: I warrant he hath a thousand of these Letters, writ
with blancke-space for different names (sure more): and
these are of the second edition: hee will print them out
of doubt: for he cares not what hee puts into the presse,
when he would put vs two: I had rather be a Giantesse,
and lye vnder Mount (^Pelion^) : Well; I will find you twentie
lasciuious Turtles ere one chaste man.
(^Mis. Ford.^) Why this is the very same: the very hand:
the very words: what doth he thinke of vs?
(^Mis. Page.^) Nay I know not: it makes me almost readie
to wrangle with mine owne honesty: Ile entertaine
my selfe like one that I am not acquainted withall: for
sure vnlesse hee know some straine in mee, that I know
not my selfe, hee would neuer haue boorded me in this
furie.
(^Mi. Ford.^) Boording, call you it? Ile bee sure to keepe
him aboue decke.
(^Mi. Page.^) So will I: if hee come vnder my hatches,
Ile neuer to Sea againe: Let's bee reueng'd on him: let's
appoint him a meeting: giue him a show of comfort in
his Suit, and lead him on with a fine baited delay, till hee
hath pawn'd his horses to mine Host of the Garter.
(^Mi. Ford.^) Nay, I wil consent to act any villany against
him, that may not sully the charinesse of our honesty: oh
that my husband saw this Letter: it would giue eternall
food to his iealousie.
(^Mis. Page.^) Why look where he comes; and my good
man too: hee's as farre from iealousie, as I am from giuing
him cause, and that (I hope) is an vnmeasurable
distance.
(^Mis. Ford.^) You are the happier woman.
(^Mis. Page.^) Let's consult together against this greasie
Knight: Come hither.
(^Ford.^) Well: I hope, it be not so.
(^Pist.^) Hope is a curtall-dog in some affaires:
Sir (^Iohn^) affects thy wife.
(^Ford.^) Why sir, my wife is not young.
(^Pist.^) He wooes both high and low, both rich & poor,
both yong and old, one with another ( (^Ford^) ) he loues the
Gally-mawfry ( (^Ford^) ) perpend.
(^Ford.^) Loue my wife?
(^Pist.^) With liuer, burning hot: preuent:
Or goe thou like Sir (^Acteon^) he, with
Ring-wood at thy heeles: O, odious is the name.
(^Ford.^) What name Sir?
(^Pist.^) The horne I say: Farewell:
Take heed, haue open eye, for theeues doe foot by night.
Take heed, ere sommer comes, or Cuckoo-birds do sing.
Away sir Corporall (^Nim^) :
Beleeue it ( (^Page^) ) he speakes sence.
(^Ford.^) I will be patient: I will find out this.
<P 44.C2>
(^Nim.^) And this is true: I like not the humor of lying:
Hee hath wronged mee in some humors: I should haue
borne the humour'd Letter to her: but I haue a sword:
and it shall bite vpon my necessitie: he loues your wife;
There's the short and the long: My name is Corporall
(^Nim^) : I speak, and I auouch; 'tis true: my name is          #
(^Nim^) :
and (^Falstaffe^) loues your wife: adieu, I loue not the humour
of bread and cheese: adieu.
(^Page.^) The humour of it (quoth'a?) heere's a fellow
frights English out of his wits.
(^Ford.^) I will seeke out (^Falstaffe^) .
(^Page.^) I neuer heard such a drawling-affecting rogue.
(^Ford.^) If I doe finde it: well.
(^Page.^) I will not beleeue such a (^Cataian^) , though the
Priest o' th'Towne commended him for a true man.
(^Ford.^) 'Twas a good sensible fellow: well.
(^Page.^) How now (^Meg^) ?
(^Mist. Page.^) Whether goe you ( (^George^) ?) harke you.
(^Mis Ford.^) How now (sweet (^Frank^) ) why art thou
melancholy?
(^Ford.^) I melancholy? I am not melancholy:
Get you home: goe.
(^Mis. Ford.^) Faith, thou hast some crochets in thy head,
Now: will you goe, (^Mistris Page^) ?
(^Mis. Page.^) Haue with you: you'll come to dinner
(^George^) ? Looke who comes yonder: shee shall bee our
Messenger to this paltrie Knight.
(^Mis. Ford.^) Trust me, I thought on her: shee'll fit it.
(^Mis. Page.^) You are come to see my daughter (^Anne^) ?
(^Qui.^) I forsooth: and I pray how do's good Mistresse
(^Anne^) ?
(^Mis. Page.^) Go in with vs and see: we haue an houres
talke with you.
(^Page.^) How now Master Ford?
(^For.^) You heard what this knaue told me, did you not?
(^Page.^) Yes, and you heard what the other told me?
(^Ford.^) Doe you thinke there is truth in them?
(^Pag.^) Hang 'em slaues: I doe not thinke the Knight
would offer it: But these that accuse him in his intent
towards our wiues, are a yoake of his discarded men: very
rogues, now they be out of seruice.
(^Ford.^) Were they his men?
(^Page.^) Marry were they.
(^Ford.^) I like it neuer the beter for that,
Do's he lye at the Garter?
(^Page.^) I marry do's he: if hee should intend this voyage
toward my wife, I would turne her loose to him;
and what hee gets more of her, then sharpe words, let it
lye on my head.
(^Ford.^) I doe not misdoubt my wife: but I would bee
loath to turne them together: a man may be too confident:
I would haue nothing lye on my head: I cannot
be thus satisfied.
(^Page.^) Looke where my ranting Host of the Garter
comes: there is eyther liquor in his pate, or mony in his
purse, when hee lookes so merrily: How now mine
Host?
(^Host.^) How now Bully-Rooke: thou'rt a Gentleman
Caueleiro Iustice, I say.
(^Shal.^) I follow, (mine Host) I follow: Good-euen,
and twenty (good Master (^Page^) .) Master (^Page^) , wil you   #
go
with vs? we haue sport in hand.
(^Host.^) Tell him Caueleiro-Iustice: tell him
Bully-Rooke.
(^Shall.^) Sir, there is a fray to be fought, betweene Sir
(^Hugh^) the Welch Priest, and (^Caius^) the French Doctor.
<P 45.C1>
(^Ford.^) Good mine Host o' th'Garter: a word with you.
(^Host.^) What saist thou, my Bully-Rooke?
(^Shal.^) Will you goe with vs to behold it? My merry
Host hath had the measuring of their weapons; and (I
thinke) hath appointed them contrary places: for (beleeue 
mee) I heare the Parson is no Iester: harke, I will
tell you what our sport shall be.
(^Host.^) Hast thou no suit against my Knight? my
guest-Caualeire?
(^Shal.^) None, I protest: but Ile giue you a pottle of
burn'd sacke, to giue me recourse to him, and tell him  
my name is (^Broome^) : onely for a iest.
(^Host.^) My hand, (Bully:) thou shalt haue egresse and
regresse, (said I well?) and thy name shall be (^Broome^) . It
is a merry Knight: will you goe An-heires?
(^Shal.^) Haue with you Mine Host.
(^Page.^) I haue heard the French-man hath good skill
in his Rapier.
(^Shal.^) Tut sir: I could haue told you more: In these
times you stand on distance: your Passes, Stoccado's, and
I know not what: 'tis the heart (Master (^Page^) ) 'tis heere,
'tis heere: I haue seene the time with my long-sword, I
would haue made you fowre tall fellowes skippe like
Rattes.
(^Host.^) Heere boyes, heere, heere: shall we wag?
(^Page.^) Haue with you: I had rather heare them scold,
then fight.
(^Ford.^) Though (^Page^) be a secure foole, and stands so
firmely on his wiues frailty; yet, I cannot put-off my opinion
so easily: she was in his company at (^Pages^) house:
and what they made there, I know not. Well, I wil looke
further into't, and I haue a disguise, to sound                 #
(^Falstaffe^) ; if
I finde her honest, I loose not my labor: if she be otherwise,
'tis labour well bestowed.
(\Exeunt.\)

[} (\SCOENA SECUNDA.\) }]

(^Enter^) Falstaffe, Pistoll, Robin, Quickly, Bardolffe,
Ford.

(^Fal.^) I will not lend thee a penny.
(^Pist.^) Why then the world's mine Oyster, which I,
with sword will open.
(^Fal.^) Not a penny: I haue beene content (Sir,) you
should lay my countenance to pawne: I haue grated vpon
my good friends for three Repreeues for you, and
your Coach-fellow (^Nim^) ; or else you had look'd through
the grate, like a Geminy of Baboones: I am damn'd in
hell, for swearing to Gentlemen my friends, you were
good Souldiers, and tall-fellowes. And when Mistresse
(^Briget^) lost the handle of her Fan, I took't vpon mine       #
honour
thou hadst it not.
(^Pist.^) Didst not thou share? hadst thou not fifteene
pence?
(^Fal.^) Reason, you roague, reason; thinkst thou Ile endanger
my soule, (^gratis^) ? at a word, hang no more about
mee, I am no gibbet for you: goe, a short knife, and a
throng, to your Mannor of (^Pickt-hatch^) : goe, you'll not
beare a Letter for mee you roague? you stand vpon your
honor: why, (thou vnconfinable basenesse) it is as much
as I can doe to keepe the termes of my hononor precise:
I, I, I my selfe sometimes, leauing the feare of heauen on
<P 45.C2>
the left hand, and hiding mine honor in my necessity, am
faine to shufflle: to hedge, and to lurch, and yet, you
Rogue, will en-sconce your raggs; your Cat-a-Mountaine-lookes,
your red-lattice phrases, and your bold-beating-oathes,
vnder the shelter of your honor: you
will not doe it? you?
(^Pist.^) I doe relent: what would thou more of man?
(^Robin.^) Sir, here's a woman would speake with you.
(^Fal.^) Let her approach.
(^Qui.^) Giue your worship good morrow.
(^Fal.^) Good-morrow, good-wife.
(^Qui.^) Not so and't please your worship.
(^Fal.^) Good maid then.
(^Qui.^) Ile be sworne,
As my mother was the first houre I was borne.
(^Fal.^) I doe beleeue the swearer; what with me?
(^Qui.^) Shall I vouch-safe your worship a word, or
two?
(^Fal.^) Two thousand (faire woman) and ile vouchsafe
thee the hearing.
(^Qui.^) There is one Mistresse (^Ford^) , (Sir) I pray come a
little neerer this waies: I my selfe dwell with M. Doctor
(^Caius^) :
(^Fal.^) Well, on; Mistresse (^Ford^) , you say.
(^Qui.^) Your worship saies very true: I pray your worship
come a little neerer this waies.
(^Fal.^) I warrant thee, no-bodie heares: mine owne
people, mine owne people.
(^Qui.^) Are they so? heauen-blesse them, and make
them his Seruants.
(^Fal.^) Well; Mistresse (^Ford^) , what of her?
(^Qui.^) Why, Sir; shee's a good-creature; Lord, Lord,
your Worship's a wanton: well: heauen forgiue you, 
and all of vs, I pray - .
(^Fal.^) Mistresse (^Ford^) : come, Mistresse (^Ford^) .
(^Qui.^) Marry this is the short, and the long of it: you
haue brought her into such a Canaries, as 'tis wonderfull:
the best Courtier of them all (when the Court lay
at (^Windsor^) ) could neuer haue brought her to such a         #
Canarie:
yet there has beene Knights, and Lords, and Gentlemen,
with their Coaches; I warrant you Coach after
Coach, letter after letter, gift after gift, smelling so        #
sweetly;
all Muske, and so rushling, I warrant you, in silke
and golde, and in such alligant termes, and in such wine
and suger of the best, and the fairest, that would haue
wonne any womans heart: and I warrant you, they could
neuer get an eye-winke of her: I had my selfe twentie
Angels giuen me this morning, but I defie all Angels (in
any such sort, as they say) but in the way of honesty: and
I warrant you, they could neuer get her so much as sippe
on a cup with the prowdest of them all, and yet there has
beene Earles: nay, (which is more) Pentioners, but I
warrant you all is one with her.
(^Fal.^) But what saies shee to mee? be briefe my good
(^shee-Mercurie^) .
(^Qui.^) Marry, she hath receiu'd your Letter: for the
which she thankes you a thousand times; and she giues
you to notifie, that her husband will be absence from his
house, betweene ten and eleuen.
(^Fal.^) Ten, and eleuen.
(^Qui.^) I, forsooth: and then you may come and see the
picture (she sayes) that you wot of: Master (^Ford^) her        #
husband
will be from home: alas, the sweet woman leades
an ill life with him: hee's a very iealousie-man; she leads
a very frampold life with him, (good hart.)
(^Fal.^) Ten, and eleuen.
<P 46.C1>
Woman, commend me to her, I will not faile her.
(^Qui.^) Why, you say well: But I haue another messenger
to your worship: Mistresse (^Page^) hath her heartie
commendations to you to: and let mee tell you in your
eare, shee's as fartuous a ciuill modest wife, and one (I
tell you) that will not misse you morning nor euening
prayer, as any is in (^Windsor^) , who ere bee the other: and
shee bade me tell your worship, that her husband is seldome 
from home, but she hopes there will come a time.
I neuer knew a woman so doate vpon a man; surely I
thinke you haue charmes, la: yes in truth.
(^Fal.^) Not I, I assure thee; setting the attraction of my
good parts aside, I haue no other charmes.
(^Qui.^) Blessing on your heart for't.
(^Fal.^) But I pray thee tell me this: has (^Fords^) wife, and
(^Pages^) wife acquainted each other, how they loue me?
(^Qui.^) That were a iest indeed: they haue not so little
grace I hope, that were a tricke indeed: But Mistris (^Page^)
would desire you to send her your little Page of al loues:
her husband has a maruellous infectio~ to the little Page:
and truely Master (^Page^) is an honest man: neuer a wife in
(^Windsor^) leades a better life then she do's: doe what shee
will, say what she will, take all, pay all, goe to bed when
she list, rise when she list, all is as she will: and truly she
deserues it; for if there be a kinde woman in (^Windsor^) , she
is one: you must send her your Page, no remedie.
(^Fal.^) Why, I will.
(^Qu.^) Nay, but doe so then, and looke you, hee may
come and goe betweene you both: and in any case haue
a nay-word, that you may know one anothers mide,
and the Boy neuer neede to vnderstand any thing; for
'tis not good that children should know any wickednes:
olde folkes you know, haue discretion, as they say, and
know the world.
(^Fal.^) Farethee-well, commend mee to them both:
there's my purse, I am yet thy debter: Boy, goe along
with this woman, this newes distracts me.
(^Pist.^) This Puncke is one of (^Cupids^) Carriers,
Clap on more sailes, pursue: vp with your fights:
Giue fire: she is my prize, or Ocean whelme them all.
(^Fal.^) Saist thou so (old (^Iacke^) ) go thy waies: Ile make
more of thy olde body then I haue done: will they yet
looke after thee? wilt thou after the expence of so much
money, be now a gainer? good Body, I thanke thee: let
them say 'tis grossely done, so it bee fairely done, no
matter. 
(^Bar.^) Sir (^Iohn^) , there's one Master (^Broome^) below     #
would
faine speake with you, and be acquainted with you; and
hath sent your worship a mornings draught of Sacke.
(^Fal.^) (^Broome^) is his name?
(^Bar.^) I Sir.
(^Fal.^) Call him in: such (^Broomes^) are welcome to mee,
that ore'flowes such liquor: ah ha, Mistresse (^Ford^) and      #
Mistresse
(^Page^) , haue I encompass'd you? goe to, via.
(^Ford.^) 'Blesse you sir.      
(^Fal.^) And you sir: would you speake with me?
(^Ford.^) I make bold, to presse, with so little preparation
vpon you.
(^Fal.^) You'r welcome, what's your will? giue vs leaue
Drawer.
(^Ford.^) Sir, I am a Gentleman that haue spent much,
my name is (^Broome^) .
(^Fal.^) Good Master (^Broome^) , I desire more acquaintance
of you.
(^Ford.^) Good Sir (^Iohn^) , I sue for yours: not to charge
you. for I must let you vnderstand, I thinke my selfe in
<P 46.C2>
better plight for a Lender, then you are: the which hath
something emboldned me to this vnseason'd intrution:
for they say, if money goe before, all waies doe lye
open.
(^Fal.^) Money is a good Souldier (Sir) and will on.
(^Ford.^) Troth, and I haue a bag of money heere troubles
me: if you will helpe to beare it (Sir (^Iohn^) ) take all,
or halfe, for easing me of the carriage.
(^Fal.^) Sir, I know not how I may deserue to bee your
Porter.
(^Ford.^) I will tell you sir, if you will giue mee the
hearing.
(^Fal.^) Speake (good Master (^Broome^) ) I shall be glad to
be your Seruant.
(^Ford.^) Sir, I heare you are a Scholler: (I will be briefe
with you) and you haue been a man long knowne to me,
though I had neuer so good means as desire, to make my
selfe acquainted with you. I shall discouer a thing to
you, wherein I must very much lay open mine owne imperfection:
but (good sir (^Iohn^) ) as you haue one eye vpon
my follies, as you heare them vnfolded, turne another
into the Register of your owne, that I may passe with a
reproofe the easier, sith you your selfe know how easie it
is to be such an offender.
(^Fal.^) Very well Sir, proceed.
(^Ford.^) There is a Gentlewoman in this Towne, her
husbands name is (^Ford^) .
(^Fal.^) Well Sir.
(^Ford.^) I haue long lou'd  her, and I protest to you,         #
bestowed
much on her: followed her with a doating obseruance:
Ingross'd opportunities to meete her: fee'd euery
slight occasion that could but nigardly giue mee
sight of her: not only bought many presents to giue her,
but haue giuen largely to many, to know what shee
would haue giuen: briefly, I haue pursu'd her, as Loue
hath pursued mee, which hath beene on the wing of all
occasions: but whatsoeuer I haue merited, either in my
minde, or in my meanes, meede I am sure I haue receiued
none, vnlesse Experience be a Iewell, that I haue purchased
at an infinite rate, and that hath taught mee to say
this,

(^Loue like a shadow flies, when substance Loue pursues,
Pursuing that that flies, and flying what pursues.^)

(^Fal.^) Haue you receiu'd no promise of satisfaction at
her hands?
(^Ford.^) Neuer.
(^Fal.^) Haue you importun'd her to such a purpose?
(^Ford.^) Neuer
(^Fal.^) Of what qualitie was your loue then?
(^Ford.^) Like a fair house, built on another mans ground,
so that I haue lost my edifice, by mistaking the place,
where I erected it.
(^Fal.^) To what purpose haue you vnfolded this to me?
(^For.^) When I haue told you that, I  haue told you all:
Some say, that though she appeare honest to mee, yet in
other places shee enlargeth her mirth so farre, that there
is shrewd construction made of her. Now (Sir (^Iohn^) ) here
is the heart of my purpose: you are a gentleman of excellent
breeding, admirable discourse, of great admittance,
authenticke in your place and person, generally
allow'd for your many war-like, court-like, and learned
preparations.
(^Fal.^) O Sir.
(^Ford.^) Beleeue it, for you know it: there is money,
spend it, spend it, spend more; spend all I haue, onely
<P 47.C1>
giue me so much of your time in enchange of it, as to lay
an amiable siege to the honesty of this (^Fords^) wife: vse
your Art of wooing; win her to consent to you: if any
man may, you may as soone as any.
(^Fal.^) Would it apply well to the vehemency of your
affection that I should win what you would enioy? Methinkes
you prescribe to your selfe very preposterously.
(^Ford.^) O, vnderstand my drift: she dwells so securely
on the excellency of her honor, that the folly of my soule
dares not present it selfe: shee is too bright to be look'd
against. Now, could I come to her with any detection
in my hand; my desires had instance and argument to
commend themselues, I could driue her then from the
ward of her purity, her reputation, her marriage-vow,
and a thousand other her defences, which now are too - 
too strongly embattaild against me: what say you too't,
Sir (^Iohn^) ?
(^Fal.^) Master (^Broome^) , I will first make bold with your
money: next, giue mee your hand: and last, as I am a
gentleman, you shall, if you will, enioy (^Fords^) wife.
(^Ford.^) O good Sir.
(^Fal.^) I say you shall.
(^Ford.^) Want no money (Sir (^Iohn^) ) you shall want none.
(^Fal.^) Want no (^Mistresse Ford^) (Master (^Broome^) ) you    #
shall
want none: I shall be with her (I may tell you) by her
owne appointment, euen as you came in to me, her assistant,
or goe-betweene, parted from me: I say I shall be
with her betweene ten and eleuen: for at that time the
iealious-rascally-knaue her husband will be forth: come
you to me at night, you shall know how I speed.
(^Ford.^) I am blest in your acquaintance: do you know
(^Ford^) Sir?
(^Fal.^) Hang him (poore Cuckoldly knaue) I know
him not: yet I wrong him to call him poore: They say
the iealous wittolly-knaue hath masses of money, for
the which his wife seemes to me well-fauourd: I will vse
her as the key of the Cuckoldly-rogues Coffer, & ther's
my haruest-home.
(^Ford.^) I would you knew (^Ford^) sir, that you might auoid 
him, if you saw him.
(^Fal.^) Hang him, mechanicall-salt-butter rogue; I wil
stare him out of his wits: I will awe him with my cudgell:
it shall hang like a Meteor ore the Cuckolds horns:
Master (^Broome^) , thou shalt know, I will predominate ouer
the pezant, and thou shalt lye with his wife. Come
to me soone at night: (^Ford's^) a knaue, and I will aggrauate
his stile: thou (Master (^Broome^) ) shalt know him for 
knaue, and Cuckold. Come to me soone at night.
(^Ford.^) What a damn'd Epicurian-Rascall is this? my
heart is ready to cracke with impatience: who saies this
is improuident iealousie: my wife hath sent to him, the
howre is fixt, the match is made: would any man haue
thought this? see the hell of hauing a false woman: my
bed shall be abus'd, my Coffers ransack'd, my reputation
gnawne at, and I shall not onely receiue this villanous
wrong but stand vnder the adoption of abhominable
termes, and by him that does mee this wrong: Termes,
names: (^Amaimon^) sounds well: (^Lucifer^) , well:             #
(^Barbason^) ,
well: yet they are Diuels additions, the names of fiends:
But Cuckold, Wittoll, Cuckold? the Diuell himselfe
hath not such a name. (^Page^) is an Asse, a secure Asse; hee
will trust his wife, hee will not be iealous: I will rather
trust a (^Fleming^) with my butter, Parson (^Hugh^) the         #
(^Welshman^)
with my Cheese, an (^Irish-man^) with my Aqua-vitae-bottle,
or a Theefe to walke my ambling gelding, then
my wife with her selfe. Then she plots, then shee rumiuates,
<P 47.C2>
then shee deuises: and what they thinke in their
hearts they may effect, they will breake their hearts but
they will effect. Heauen bee prais'd for my iealousie:
eleuen o'clocke the howre, I will preuent this, detect
my wife, bee reueng'd on (^Falstaffe^) , and laugh at           #
(^Page^) . I
will about it, better three houres too soone, then a mynute 
too late: fie, fie, fie: Cuckold, Cuckold, Cuckold.
(^Exit.^) [^SOURCE TEXT: Exti^]

<S SAMPLE 2>
<P 54.C1>
[} (\ACTUS QUARTUS. SCENA SECUNDA.\) }]
(^Enter Falstoffe, Mist. Ford, Mist. Page, Seruants, Ford,
Page, Caius, Euans, Shallow.^) 

(^Fal.^) (^Mi. Ford.^) Your sorrow hath eaten vp my sufferance;
I see you are obsequious in your loue, and I professe
requitall to a haires bredth, not onely Mist. (^Ford^) ,
in the simple office of loue, but in all the accustrement,
complement, and ceremony of it: But are you sure of
your husband now?
(^Mis. Ford.^) Hee's a birding (sweet Sir (^Iohn^) .)
(^Mis. Page.^) What hoa, gossip (^Ford^) : what hoa.
(^Mis. Ford.^) Step into th'chamber, Sir (^Iohn^) .
(^Mis. Page.^) How now (sweete heart) whose at home
besides your selfe?
(^Mis. Ford.^) Why none but mine owne people.
(^Mis. Page.^) Indeed?
(^Mis. Ford.^) No certainly: Speake louder.
(^Mist. Pag.^) Truly, I am so glad you haue no body here.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Why?
(^Mis. Page.^) Why woman, your husband is in his olde
lines againe: he so takes on yonder with my husband, so
railes against all married mankinde; so curses all (^Eues^)
daughters, of what complexion soeuer; and so buffettes
himselfe on the for-head: crying peere-out, peere-out,
that any madnesse I euer yet beheld, seem'd but tamenesse,
ciuility, and patience to this his distemper he is in
now: I am glad the fat Knight is not heere.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Why, do's he talke of him?
(^Mist. Page.^) Of none but him, and sweares he was caried
out the last time hee search'd for him, in a Basket:
Protests to my husband he is now heere, & hath drawne
him and the rest of their company from their sport, to
make another experiment of his suspition: But I am glad
the Knight is not heere; now he shall see his owne
foolerie.
(^Mist. Ford.^) How neere is he Mistris (^Page^) ?
(^Mist. Pag.^) Hard by, at street end; he wil be here anon.
(^Mist. Ford.^) I am vndone, the Knight is heere.
(^Mist. Page^) Why then you are vtterly sham'd, & hee's
but a dead man. What a woman are you? Away with
him, away with him: Better shame, then murther.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Which way should he go? How should I
bestow him? Shall I put him into the basket againe?
(^Fal.^) No, Ile come no more i'th Basket:
May I not go out ere he come?
<P 54.C2>
(^Mist. Page.^) Alas: three of M=r=. (^Fords^) brothers watch
the doore with Pistols, that none shall issue out: otherwise
you might slip away ere hee came: But what make
you heere?
(^Fal.^) What shall I do? Ile creepe vp into the chimney.
(^Mist. Ford.^) There they alwaies vse to discharge their
Birding-peeces: creepe into the Kill-hole.
(^Fal.^) Where is it?
(^Mist. Ford.^) He will seeke there on my word: Neyther
Presse, Coffer, Chest, Trunke, Well, Vault, but he hath
an abstract for the remembrance of such places, and goes
to them by his Note: There is no hiding you in the
house.
(^Fal.^) Ile go out then.
(^Mist. Ford.^) If you goe out in your owne semblance,
you die Sir (^Iohn^) , vnlesse you go out disguis'd.
(^Mist. Ford.^) How might we disguise him?
(^Mist. Page.^) Alas, the day I know not, there is no womans
gowne bigge enough for him: otherwise he might
put on a hat, a muffler, and a kerchiefe, and so escape.
(^Fal.^) Good hearts, deuise something: any extremitie,
rather then a mischiefe.
(^Mist. Ford.^) My Maids Aunt the fat woman of (^Brainford^) ,
has a gowne aboue.
(^Mist. Page.^) On my word it will serue him: shee's as
big as he is: and there's her thrum'd hat, and her muffler
too: run vp Sir (^Iohn^) .
(^Mist. Ford.^) Go, go sweet Sir (^Iohn^) : (^Mistris Page^)    #
and
I will looke some linnen for your head.
(^Mist. Page.^) Quicke, quicke, wee'le come dresse you
straight: put on the gowne the while.
(^Mist. Ford.^) I would my husband would meete him
in this shape: he cannot abide the old woman of Brainford;
he sweares she's a witch, forbad her my house, and
hath threatned to beate her.
(^Mist. Page.^) Heauen guide him to thy husbands cudgell:
and the diuell guide his cudgell afterwards.
(^Mist. Ford.^) But is my husband comming?
(^Mist. Page.^) I in good sadnesse is he, and talkes of the
basket too, howsoeuer he hath had intelligence.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Wee'l try that: for Ile appoint my men to
carry the basket againe, to meete him at the doore with
it, as they did last time.
(^Mist. Page.^) Nay, but hee'l be heere presently: let's go
dresse him like the witch of (^Brainford^) .
(^Mist. Ford.^) Ile first direct my men, what they
shall doe with the basket: Goe vp, Ile bring linnen for
him straight.
(^Mist. Page.^) Hang him dishonest Varlet,
We cannot misuse enough:
We'll leaue a proofe by that which we will doo,
Wiues may be merry, and yet honest too:
We do not acte that often, iest, and laugh,
'Tis old, but true, Still Swine eats all the draugh.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Go Sirs, take the basket againe on your
shoulders: your Master is hard at doore: if hee bid you
set it downe, obey him: quickly, dispatch.
(^1. Ser.^) Come, come, take it vp.
(^2. Ser.^) Pray heauen it be not full of Knight againe.
(^1. Ser.^) I hope not, I had liefe as beare so much lead.
(^Ford.^) I, but if it proue true (M=r=. (^Page^) ) haue you    #
any
way then to vnfoole me againe. Set downe the basket
villaine: some body call my wife: Youth in a basket:
Oh you Panderly Rascals, there's a knot: a gin, a packe,
a conspiracie against me: Now shall the diuel be sham'd.
What wife I say: Come, come forth: behold what honest
<P 55.C1>
cloathes you send forth to bleaching.
(^Page.^) Why, this passes M. (^Ford^) : you are not to goe
loose any longer, you must be pinnion'd.
(^Euans.^) Why, this is Lunaticks: this is madde, as a
mad dogge.
(^Shall.^) Indeed (^M. Ford^) , thi is not well indeed.
(^Ford.^) So say I too Sir, come hither Mistris (^Ford^) ,      #
Mistris
(^Ford^) , the honest woman, the modest wife, the vertuous
creature, that hath the iealious foole to her husband:
I suspect without cause (Mistris) do I?
(^Mist. Ford.^) Heauen be my witnesse you doe, if you
suspect me in any dishonesty.
(^Ford.^) Well said Brazon-face, hold it out: Come forth
sirrah.
(^Page.^) This passes.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Are you not asham'd, let the cloths alone.
(^Ford.^) I shall find you anon.
(^Eua.^) 'Tis vnreasonable; will you take vp your wiues
cloathes? Come, away.
(^Ford.^) Empty the basket I say.
(^M. Ford.^) Why man, why?
(^Ford.^) Master (^Page^) , as I am a man, there was one        #
conuay'd
out of my house yesterday in this basket: why
may not he be there againe, in my house I am sure he is:
my Intelligence is true, my iealousie is reasonable, pluck
me out all the linnen.
(^Mist. Ford.^) If you find a man there, he shall dye a Fleas
death.
(^Page.^) Heer's no man.
(^Shal.^) By my fidelity this is not well M=r=. (^Ford^) : This
wrongs you. 
(^Euans.^) M=r= (^Ford^) , you must pray, and not follow the
imaginations of your owne heart: this is iealousies.
(^Ford.^) Well, hee's not heere I seeke for.
(^Page.^) No, nor no where else but in your braine.
(^Ford.^) Helpe to search my house this one time: if I find
not what I seeke, shew no colour for my extremity: Let
me for euer be your Table-sport: Let them say of me, as 
iealous as (^Ford^) , that search'd a hollow Wall-nut for his
wiues Lemman. Satisfie me once more, once more serch
with me.
(^M. Ford.^) What hoa (Mistris (^Page^) ,)  come you and
the old woman downe: my husband will come into the
Chamber.
(^Ford.^) Old woman? what old womans that?
(^M. Ford.^) Why it is my maids Aunt of (^Brainford^) .
(^Ford.^) A witch, a Queane, an olde couzening queane:
Haue I not forbid her my house. She comes of errands
do's she? We are simple men, wee doe not know what's
brought to passe vnder the profession of Fortune-telling.
She workes by Charmes, by Spels, by th'Figure, & such
dawbry as this is, beyond our Element: wee know nothing.
Come downe you Witch, you Hagge you, come
downe I say.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Nay, good sweet husband, good Gentlemen,
let him strike the old woman.
(^Mist. Page.^) Come mother (^Prat^) , Come giue me your
hand.
(^Ford.^) Ile (^Prat-her^) : Out of my doore, you Witch,
you Ragge, you Baggage, you Poulcat, you Runnion, 
out, out: Ile coniure you, Ile fortune-tell you.
(^Mist. Page.^) Are you not asham'd?
I thinke you haue kill'd the poore woman.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Nay he will do it, 'tis a goodly credite
for you.
(^Ford.^) Hang her witch.
<P 55.C2>
(^Eua.^) By yea, and no, I thinke the o'man is a witch indeede:
I like not when a o'man has a great peard; I spie 
a great peard vnder his muffler.
(^Ford.^) Will you follow Gentlemen, I beseech you follow:
see but the issue of my iealousie: If I cry out thus
vpon no traile, neuer trust me when I open againe.
(^Page.^) Let's obey his humour a little further:
Come Gentlemen.
(^Mist. Page.^) Trust me he beate him most pittifully.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Nay by th'Masse that he did not: he beate
him most vnpittifully, me thought.
(^Mist. Page.^) Ile haue the cudgell hallow'd, and hung
ore the Altar, it hath done meritorious seruice.   
(^Mist. Ford.^) What thinke you? May we with the warrant
of woman hood, and the witnesse of a good conscience,
pursue him with any further reuenge?
(^M. Page.^) The spirit of wantonnesse is sure scar'd out
of him, if the diuell haue him not in fee-simple, with 
fine and recouery, he will neuer (I thinke) in the way of
waste, attempt vs againe.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Shall we tell our husbands how wee haue
seru'd him?
(^Mist. Page.^) Yes, by all meanes: if it be but to scrape
the figures out of your husbands braines: if they can find
in their hearts, the poore vnuertuous fat Knight shall be
any further afflicted, wee two will still bee the
ministers.
(^Mist. Ford.^) Ile warrant, they'l haue him publiquely
sham'd, and me thinkes there would be no period to the
iest, should he not be publikely sham'd.
(^Mist. Page.^) Come, to the Forge with it, then shape it:
I would not haue things coole.
(\Exeunt.\)



