{COM:insert_helsinki_sample_1} Enter Worthy . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.3) Wor. Save you , (VANBR-E3-P1,41.4) save you , good People ; (VANBR-E3-P1,41.5) $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} glad to find you all alive ; (VANBR-E3-P1,41.6) I met a wounded Peer carrying off : (VANBR-E3-P1,41.7) For Heav'ns sake , what was the matter ? (VANBR-E3-P1,41.8) Lov. O a Trifle : (VANBR-E3-P1,41.9) He wou'd have lain with my Wife before my Face , (VANBR-E3-P1,41.10) so she oblig'd him with a Box $on $the {TEXT:o'the} Ear , (VANBR-E3-P1,41.11) and I run him thro' the Body : (VANBR-E3-P1,41.12) That was all . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.13) Wor. Bagatelle on all sides . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.14) But , pray Madam , how long has this noble Lord been an humble Servant of yours ? (VANBR-E3-P1,41.15) Aman. This is the first I have heard on't . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.16) So I suppose $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} his Quality more than his Love , has brought him into this Adventure . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.17) He thinks his Title an authentick Passport to every Woman's Heart , below the Degree of a Peeress . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.18) Wor. $He $'s {TEXT:He's} Coxcomb enough to think any thing . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.19) But I wou'd not have you brought into Trouble for him : (VANBR-E3-P1,41.20) I hope $there $'s {TEXT:there's} no Danger of his Life ? (VANBR-E3-P1,41.21) Lov. None at all : (VANBR-E3-P1,41.22) $He $'s {TEXT:He's} fallen into the Hands of a Roguish Surgeon , I perceive designs to frighten a little Money out of him . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.23) But I saw his Wound , (VANBR-E3-P1,41.24) $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} nothing ; (VANBR-E3-P1,41.25) he may go to the Play to Night , if he pleases . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.26) Wor. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} glad you have corrected him without farther Mischief . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.27) And now , Sir , if these Ladies have no farther Service for you , $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} oblige me if you can go to the Place I spoke to you of t'other Day . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.28) Lov. With all my Heart . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.29) Aside . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.30) Tho' I cou'd wish , $me $thinks {TEXT:methinks} , to stay and gaze a little longer on that Creature . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.31) Good Gods ! (VANBR-E3-P1,41.32) How beautiful she is . - (VANBR-E3-P1,41.33) But what have I to do with Beauty ? (VANBR-E3-P1,41.34) I have already had my Portion , (VANBR-E3-P1,41.35) and must not covet more . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.36) To Wor. Come , Sir , when you please . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.37) Wor. Ladies , your Servant . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.38) Aman. Mr. Loveless , pray one Word with you before you go . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.39) Lov. to Wor. $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} overtake you , Sir ; (VANBR-E3-P1,41.40) What wou'd my Dear ? (VANBR-E3-P1,41.41) Aman. Only a Woman's foolish Question , (VANBR-E3-P1,41.42) How do you like my Couzen here ? (VANBR-E3-P1,41.43) Lov. Jealous already , Amanda ? (VANBR-E3-P1,41.44) Aman. Not at all ; (VANBR-E3-P1,41.45) I ask you for another Reason . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.46) Lov. Aside . Whate'er her Reason be , I must not tell her true . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.47) To Aman. Why , I confess $she $'s {TEXT:she's} handsome . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.48) But you must not think I slight your Kinswoman , if I own to you , of all the Women who may claim that Character , she is the last wou'd triumph in my Heart . (VANBR-E3-P1,41.49) Aman. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} satisfy'd . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.51) Lov. Now tell me why you ask'd ? (VANBR-E3-P1,42.52) Aman. At Night I will . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.53) Adieu . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.54) Lov. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} yours . kissing her . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.55) Exit Lov. (VANBR-E3-P1,42.56) Aman. aside . $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} glad to find he does not like her ; (VANBR-E3-P1,42.57) for I have a great mind to perswade her to come and live with me . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.58) To Ber. Now dear Berinthia , let me enquire a little into your Affairs : (VANBR-E3-P1,42.59) for I do assure you I am enough your Friend , to interest myself in every thing that concerns you . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.60) Ber. You formerly have given me such Proofs on't , I shou'd be very much to blame to doubt it ; (VANBR-E3-P1,42.61) I am sorry I have no Secrets to trust you with , that I might convince you how entire a Confidence I durst repose in you . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.62) Aman. Why is it possible , that one so Young and Beautiful as you , shou'd live and have no Secrets ? (VANBR-E3-P1,42.63) Ber. What Secrets do you mean ? (VANBR-E3-P1,42.64) Aman. Lovers . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.65) Ber. O Twenty ; but not one secret one amongst 'em . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.66) Lovers in this Age have too much Honour to do any thing under-hand ; (VANBR-E3-P1,42.67) they do all above-board . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.68) Aman. That now $me $thinks {TEXT:methinks} wou'd make me hate a Man . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.69) Ber. But the Women of the Town are of another Mind : (VANBR-E3-P1,42.70) For by this means a Lady may with the Expence of a few Coquet Glances , lead twenty Fools about in a String , for two or three Years together . Whereas , if she shou'd allow 'em greater Favours , and oblige 'em to Secrecie , she wou'd not keep one of 'em a Fortnight . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.71) Aman. $There $'s {TEXT:There's} something indeed in That to satisfie the Vanity of a Woman , (VANBR-E3-P1,42.72) but I $can $n't {TEXT:can't} comprehend how the Men find their Account in it . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.73) Ber. Their Entertainment , I must confess , is a Riddle to me . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.74) For $there $'s {TEXT:there's} very few of them ever get farther than a Bow and an Ogle . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.75) I have half a Score for my share , who follow me all over the Town ; and at the Play , the Park , and the Church , do with their Eyes say the violent'st things to me - (VANBR-E3-P1,42.76) But I never hear any more of 'em . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.77) Aman. What can be the Reason of that ? (VANBR-E3-P1,42.78) Ber. One Reason is , They $do $n't {TEXT:don't} know how to go farther . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.79) They have had so little Practice , they $do $n't {TEXT:don't} understand the Trade . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.80) But besides their Ignorance , you must know there is not one of my half score Lovers but what follows half a score Mistresses . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.81) Now their Affections being divided amongst so many , are not strong enough for any one to make 'em pursue her to the purpose . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.82) Like a young Puppy in a Warren , they have a Flirt at all , (VANBR-E3-P1,42.83) and catch none . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.84) Aman. Yet they seem to have a Torrent of Love to dispose of . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.85) Ber. They have so : (VANBR-E3-P1,42.86) But $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} like the Rivers of a Modern Philosopher , whose Works , tho' a Woman , I have read (VANBR-E3-P1,42.87) it sets out with a violent Stream , (VANBR-E3-P1,42.88) splits in a thousand Branches , (VANBR-E3-P1,42.89) and is all lost in the Sands . (VANBR-E3-P1,42.90) Aman. But do you think this River of Love runs all its Course without doing any Mischief ? (VANBR-E3-P1,43.92) Do you think it overflows nothing . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.93) Ber. O yes ; $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} true , (VANBR-E3-P1,43.94) it never breaks into any Bodies Ground that has the least Fence about it ; (VANBR-E3-P1,43.95) but it overflows all the Commons that lie in its way . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.96) And this is the utmost Atchievement of those dreadful Champions in the Field of Love - the Beaux . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.97) Aman. But $pray $thee {TEXT:prithee} , Berinthia , instruct me a little farther , (VANBR-E3-P1,43.98) for I am so great a Novice , $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} almost asham'd on't . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.99) My Husband's leaving me whils't I was Young and Fond , threw me into that Depth of Discontent , that ever since I have led so private and recluse a Life , my Ignorance is scarce conceivable . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.100) I therefore fain would be instructed : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.101) Not Heaven knows that what you call Intrigues have any Charms for me : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.102) my Love and Principles are too well fix'd . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.103) The Practick Part of all unlawful Love is - (VANBR-E3-P1,43.104) Ber. O $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} abominable : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.105) But for the Speculative ; that we must all confess is entertaining . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.106) The Conversation of all the Virtuous Women in the Town turns upon that and new Cloaths . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.107) Aman. Pray be so just then to me , to believe , $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} with a World of Innocency I wou'd enquire , Whether you think those Women we call Women of Reputation , do really 'scape all other Men , as they do those Shadows of 'em , the Beaux . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.108) Ber. O no , Amanda ; there are a sort of Men make dreadful Work amongst 'em : Men that may be call'd The Beaux Antipathy ; (VANBR-E3-P1,43.109) for they agree in nothing but walking upon two Legs . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.110) These have Brains : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.111) The Beau has none . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.112) These are in Love with their Mistress : The Beau with himself . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.113) They take care of her Reputation : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.114) $He $'s {TEXT:He's} industrious to destroy it . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.115) They are decent : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.116) $He $'s {TEXT:He's} a Fop . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.117) They are sound : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.118) $He $'s {TEXT:He's} rotten . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.119) They are Men : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.120) $He $'s {TEXT:He's} an Ass . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.121) Aman. If this be their Character , I fancy we had here e'en now a Pattern of 'em both . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.122) Ber. His Lordship and Mr. Worthy ? (VANBR-E3-P1,43.123) Aman. The same . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.124) Ber. As for the Lord , $he $'s {TEXT:he's} eminently so : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.125) And for the other , I can assure you , $there $'s {TEXT:there's} not a Man in Town who has a better Interest with the Women , that are worth having an Interest with . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.126) But $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} all private : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.127) $He $'s {TEXT:He's} like a Back-stair Minister at Court , who , whilst the reputed Favourites are sauntering in the Bed-Chamber , is ruling the Roast in the Closet . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.128) Aman. He answers then the Opinion I had ever of him . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.129) Heavens ! (VANBR-E3-P1,43.130) What a difference there is between a Man like him , and that vain nauseous Fop , Sir Novelty ! (VANBR-E3-P1,43.131) Taking her Hand . I must acquaint you . with a Secret , Couzen . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.132) $'T $is {TEXT:'Tis} not that Fool alone has talked to me of Love . (VANBR-E3-P1,43.133) Worthy has been tampering too : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.134) $'T $is {TEXT:'Tis} true , he has $don $'t {TEXT:don't} in vain : (VANBR-E3-P1,43.135) Not all his Charms or Art have power to shake me . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.136) My Love , my Duty , and my Vertue , are such faithful Guards , I need not fear my Heart shou'd e'er betray me . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.137) But what I wonder at is this : (VANBR-E3-P1,44.138) I find I did not start at his Proposal , as when it came from one whom I contemn'd . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.139) I therefore mention this Attempt , that I may learn from you whence it proceeds ; That Vice which $can $not {TEXT:cannot} change its Nature shou'd so far change at least its Shape , as that the self-same Crime propos'd from one shall seem a Monster gaping at your Ruine , when from another it shall look so kind , as tho' it were your Friend , and never meant to harm you . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.140) Whence think you can this Difference proceed ? (VANBR-E3-P1,44.141) For $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} not Love , Heaven knows . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.142) Ber. O no ; I wou'd not for the World believe it were . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.143) But possibly , shou'd there a dreadful Sentence pass upon you , to undergo the Rage of both their Passions ; the Pain you apprehend from one might seem so trivial to the other ; the Danger wou'd not quite so much allarm you . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.144) Aman. Fy , fy , Berinthia , you wou'd indeed allarm me , cou'd you incline me to a Thought , that all the Merit of Mankind combin'd , cou'd shake that tender Love I bear my Husband : (VANBR-E3-P1,44.145) No , he sits triumphant in my Heart , (VANBR-E3-P1,44.146) and nothing can dethrone him . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.147) Ber. But shou'd he Abdicate again , do you think you shou'd preserve the vacant Throne ten tedious Winters more in hopes of his return ? (VANBR-E3-P1,44.148) Aman. Indeed I think I shou'd . Tho' I confess , after those Obligations he has to me , shou'd he abandon me once more , my Heart wou'd grow extreamly urgent with me to root him thence , and cast him out for ever . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.149) Ber. Were I that thing they call a slighted Wife , some body shou'd run the risque of being that thing they call - a Husband . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.150) Aman. O fy , Berinthia , no Revenge shou'd ever be taken against a Husband : (VANBR-E3-P1,44.151) But to wrong his Bed is a Vengeance , which of all Vengeance - Ber. Is the sweetest - ha , ha , ha . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.152) $Do $n't {TEXT:Don't} I talk madly ? (VANBR-E3-P1,44.153) Aman. Madly indeed . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.154) Ber. Yet $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} very innocent . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.155) Aman. That I dare swear you are . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.156) I know how to make Allowances for your Humour : (VANBR-E3-P1,44.157) You were always very entertaining Company ; (VANBR-E3-P1,44.158) but I find since Marriage and Widowhood have shewn you the World a little , you are very much improv'd . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.159) Ber. aside . Alack a day , there has gone more than that to improve me , if she knew all . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.160) Aman. For Heaven's sake , Berinthia , tell me what way I shall take to perswade you to come and live with me ? (VANBR-E3-P1,44.161) Ber. Why , one way in the World there is - and but one . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.162) Aman. Pray which is that ? (VANBR-E3-P1,44.163) Ber. It is to assure me - I shall be very welcome . (VANBR-E3-P1,44.164) Aman. If that be all , you shall e'en-1 lie here to Night . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.166) Ber. To Night ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.167) Aman. Yes , to Night . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.168) Ber. Why , the People where I lodge will think me mad . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.169) Aman. Let 'em think what they please . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.170) Ber. Say you so , Amanda ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.171) Why then they shall think what they please : (VANBR-E3-P1,45.172) For $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} a young Widow , (VANBR-E3-P1,45.173) and I care not what any body thinks . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.174) Ah , Amanda , it 's {TEXT:it's} a delicious thing to be a young Widow . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.175) Aman. $You $'ll {TEXT:You'll} hardly make me think so . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.176) Ber. Phu , because you are in Love with your Husband : (VANBR-E3-P1,45.177) but that is not every Woman's Case . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.178) Aman. I hope $'t $was {TEXT:'twas} yours , at least . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.179) Ber. Mine , say ye ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.180) Now I have a great mind to tell you a Lye , (VANBR-E3-P1,45.181) but I shou'd do it so awkwardly , $you $'d {TEXT:you'd} find me out . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.182) Aman. Then e'en speak the Truth . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.183) Ber. Shall I ? - (VANBR-E3-P1,45.184) Then after all , I did love him , Amanda - as a Nun does Penance . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.185) Aman. Why did not you refuse to marry him then ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.186) Ber. Because my Mother wou'd have whipt me . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.187) Aman. How did you live together ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.188) Ber. Like Man and Wife , asunder ; (VANBR-E3-P1,45.189) He lov'd the Country , I the Town . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.190) He Hawks and Hounds , I Coaches and Equipage . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.191) He Eating and Drinking , I Carding and Playing . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.192) He the Sound of a Horn , I the Squeak of a Fiddle . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.193) We were dull Company at Table , worse A-bed . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.194) Whenever we met , we gave one another the Spleen . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.195) And never agreed but once , which was about lying alone . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.196) Aman. But tell me one thing truly and sincerely . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.197) Ber. $What $'s {TEXT:What's} that ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.198) Aman. Notwithstanding all these jars , did not his Death at last - extremely trouble you ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.199) Ber. O yes : (VANBR-E3-P1,45.200) Not that my present Pangs were so very violent , but the After-pains were intollerable . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.201) I was forc'd to wear a beastly Widow's Band a Twelvemonth for't . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.202) Aman. Women , I find , have different Inclinations . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.203) Ber. Women , I find , keep different Company . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.204) When your Husband ran away from you , if you had fallen into some of my Acquaintance , $'t $would {TEXT:'twould} have sav'd you many a Tear . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.205) But you go (VANBR-E3-P1,45.206) and live with a Grandmother , a Bishop , and an old Nurse ; which was enough to make any Woman break her Heart for her Husband . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.207) Pray , Amanda , if ever you are a Widow again , keep your self so as I do . (VANBR-E3-P1,45.208) Aman. Why , do you then resolve $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} never marry ? (VANBR-E3-P1,45.209) Ber. O , no ; I resolve I will . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.211) Aman. How so ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.212) Ber. That I never may . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.213) Aman. You banter me . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.214) Ber. Indeed I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.215) But I consider $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} a Woman , (VANBR-E3-P1,46.216) and form my Resolutions accordingly . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.217) Aman. Well , my Opinion is , form-2 what Resolution you will Matrimony will be the end on't . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.218) Ber. Faith it $wo $n't {TEXT:won't} . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.219) Aman. How do you know ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.220) Ber. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} sure on't . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.221) Aman. Why , do you think $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} impossible for you to fall in Love ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.222) Ber. No . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.223) Aman. Nay , but to grow so passionately fond , that nothing but the Man you love can give you rest ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.224) Ber. Well , what then ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.225) Aman. Why , then $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} marry him . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.226) Ber. How do you know that ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.227) Aman. Why , what can you do else ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.228) Ber. Nothing - but sit and cry . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.229) Aman. Psha . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.230) Ber. Ah , poor Amanda ; you have led a Country Life : (VANBR-E3-P1,46.231) But if $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} consult the Widows of this Town , $they $'ll {TEXT:they'll} tell you , you shou'd never take a Lease of a House you can hire for a Quarter's Warning . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.232) Exeunt . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.233) The End of the Second Act . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.234) ACT III . SCENE I . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.236) A Room in Lord Foppington's House . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.238) Enter Lord Foppington and Servant . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.239) Lord Fop. Hey , Fellow , let the Coach come to the Door . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.240) Serv. Will your Lordship venture so soon to expose yourself to the Weather ? (VANBR-E3-P1,46.241) Lord Fop. Sir , I will venture as soon as I can , to expose myself to the Ladies ; (VANBR-E3-P1,46.242) tho' give me my Cloak , however ; (VANBR-E3-P1,46.243) for in that Side-box , what between the Air that comes in at the Door on one side , and the intollerable Warmth of the Masks on t'other , a Man gets so many Heats and Colds , $'t $would {TEXT:'twould} destroy the Canstitution of a Harse . (VANBR-E3-P1,46.244) Ser. putting on his Cloak . I wish your Lordship wou'd please to keep House a little longer , (VANBR-E3-P1,47.246) $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} afraid your Honour does not well (VANBR-E3-P1,47.247) consider your Wound . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.248) Lord Fop. . My Wound ! - (VANBR-E3-P1,47.249) I wou'd not be in Eclipse another Day , tho' I had as many Wounds in my Guts as I have had in my Heart . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.250) Enter Young Fashion . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.251) Y. Fash. Brother , your Servant . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.252) How do you find yourself to-day ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.253) Lord Fop. So well , that I have arder'd my Coach to the Door : (VANBR-E3-P1,47.254) So $there $'s {TEXT:there's} no great Danger of Death this baut , Tam . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.255) Y. Fash. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} very glad of it . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.256) Lord Fop. aside . That I $believe $'s {TEXT:believe's} a Lye . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.257) $Pray $thee {TEXT:Prithee} , Tam , tell me one thing : (VANBR-E3-P1,47.258) Did not your Heart cut a Caper up to your Mauth , when you heard I was run thro' the Bady ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.259) Y. Fash. Why do you think it shou'd ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.260) Lord Fop. Because I remember mine did so , when I heard my Father was shat thro' the Head . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.261) Y. Fash. It then did very ill . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.262) Lord Fop. $Pray $thee {TEXT:Prithee} , why so ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.263) Y. Fash. Because he us'd you very well . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.264) Lord Fop. Well - naw strike me dumb , he starv'd me . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.265) He has let me want a Thausand Women for want of a Thausand Paund . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.266) Y. Fash. Then he hind'red you from making a great many ill Bargains ; (VANBR-E3-P1,47.267) for I think no Woman is worth Money , that will take Money . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.268) Lord Fop. If I were a younger Brother , I shou'd think so too . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.269) Y. Fash. Why , is it possible you can value a Woman $that $'s {TEXT:that's} to be bought . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.270) Lord Fop. $Pray $thee {TEXT:Prithee} , why not as well as a Pad-Nag ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.271) Y. Fash. Because a Woman has a Heart to dispose of ; (VANBR-E3-P1,47.272) a Horse has none . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.273) Lord Fop. Look you , Tam , of all things that belang to a Woman , I have an Aversion to her Heart ; (VANBR-E3-P1,47.274) far when once a Woman has given you her Heart - you can never get rid of the rest of her Body . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.275) Y. Fash. This is strange Doctrine : (VANBR-E3-P1,47.276) But pray in your Amours how is it with your own Heart ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.277) Lord Fop. Why , my Heart in my Amours is like my Heart aut of my Amours : a` la glace . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.278) My Bady , Tam , is a Watch ; (VANBR-E3-P1,47.279) and my Heart is the Pendulum to it ; (VANBR-E3-P1,47.280) whilst the Finger runs raund to every Hour in the Circle , that still beats the same time . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.281) Y. Fash. Then you are seldom much in Love ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.282) Lord Fop. Never , Stap my Vitals . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.283) Y. Fash. Why then did you make all this Bustle about Amanda ? (VANBR-E3-P1,47.284) Lord Fop. Because she was a Woman of an Insolent Vertue , (VANBR-E3-P1,47.285) and I thought myself piqu'd in Honour to debauch her . (VANBR-E3-P1,47.286) Y. Fash. Very well . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.288) Aside . $Here $'s {TEXT:Here's} a rare Fellow for you , to have the spending of Five Thousand Pounds a Year . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.289) But now for my business with him . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.290) To Lord Fop. Brother , tho' I know to talk of business especially of Money is a Theme not quite so entertaining to you as that of the Ladies ; my Necessities are such , I hope $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} have patience to hear me . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.291) Lord Fop. The greatness of your Necessities , Tam , is the worst Argument in the World for your being patiently heard . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.292) I do believe you are going to make me a very good Speech , (VANBR-E3-P1,48.293) but , strike me dumb , it has the worst beginning of any Speech I have heard this Twelve-month . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.294) Y. Fash. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} very sorry you think so . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.295) Lord Fop. I do believe thau art . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.296) But come , $let $'s {TEXT:let's} know thy Affair quickly ; (VANBR-E3-P1,48.297) far $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} a new Play , (VANBR-E3-P1,48.298) and I shall be so rumpled and squeez'd with pressing thro' the Crawd , to get to my Servant , the Women will think I have lain all Night in my Cloaths . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.299) Y. Fash. Why then that I may not be the Author of so great a Misfortune my Case in a Word is this . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.300) The necessary Expences of my Travels have so much exceeded the wretched Income of my Annuity , that I have been forced to Mortgage it for Five Hundred Pounds , which is spent ; so that unless you are so kind to assist me in redeeming it , I know no Remedy , but to go take a Purse . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.301) Lord Fop. Why , Faith , Tam - to give you my Sense of the thing , I do think taking a Purse the best Remedy in the World ; (VANBR-E3-P1,48.302) for if you succeed , you are reliev'd that way ; (VANBR-E3-P1,48.303) if you are taken - you are reliev'd t'other . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.304) Y. Fash. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} glad to see you are in so pleasant a Humour , (VANBR-E3-P1,48.305) I hope I shall find the effects on't . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.306) Lord Fop. Why , do you then really think it a reasonable thing I shou'd give you Five Hundred Paunds ? (VANBR-E3-P1,48.307) Y. Fash. I do not ask it as a due , Brother , (VANBR-E3-P1,48.308) I am willing to receive it as a Favour . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.309) Lord Fop. Thau art willing to receive it any haw , strike me speechless . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.310) But these are damn'd times to give Money in , Taxes are so great , Repairs so exorbitant , Tenants such Rogues , and Periwigs so dear , that the Devil take me , $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} reduc'd to that extremity in my Cash , I have been forc'd to retrench in that one Article of sweet Pawder , till I have braught it dawn to Five Guineas a Manth . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.311) Naw judge , Tam , whether I can spare you Five Hundred Paunds ? (VANBR-E3-P1,48.312) Y. Fash. If you $can $n't {TEXT:can't} , I must starve , (VANBR-E3-P1,48.313) $that $'s {TEXT:that's} all . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.314) Aside . Damn him . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.315) Lord Fop. All I can say is , you should have been a better Husband . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.316) Y. Fash. 'Oons , if you $can $n't {TEXT:can't} live upon Five Thousand a Year , how do you think I shou'd $do $'t {TEXT:do't} upon Two Hundred ? (VANBR-E3-P1,48.317) Lord Fop. $Do $n't {TEXT:Don't} be in a Passion , Tam ; (VANBR-E3-P1,48.318) far Passion is the most unbecoming thing in the World - to the Face . (VANBR-E3-P1,48.319) Look you , I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} love to say any thing to you to make you Melancholy ; (VANBR-E3-P1,49.321) but upon this occasion I must take leave to put you in mind , that a Running Horse does require more Attendance than a Coach-Horse . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.322) Nature has made some difference 'twixt you and I . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.323) Y. Fash. Yes , she has made you older . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.324) Aside . Pox take her . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.325) Lord Fop. That is nat all , Tam . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.326) Y. Fash. Why , what is there else ? (VANBR-E3-P1,49.327) Lord Fop. looking first upon himself , then upon his Brother . - Ask the Ladies . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.328) Y. Fash. Why , thou Essence Bottle , thou Musk-Cat , dost thou then think thou hast any Advantage over me , but what Fortune has given thee ? (VANBR-E3-P1,49.329) Lord Fop. I do - stap my Vitals . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.330) Y. Fash. Now , by all $that $'s {TEXT:that's} Great and Powerful , thou art the Prince of Coxcombs . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.331) Lord Fop. Sir - I am praud of being at the Head of so prevailing a Party . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.332) Y. Fash. Will nothing then provoke thee ? - (VANBR-E3-P1,49.333) Draw Coward . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.334) Lord Fop. Look you , Tam , you know I have always taken you for a mighty dull Fellow , (VANBR-E3-P1,49.335) and here is one of the foolishest Plats broke out , that I have seen a long time . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.336) Your Paverty makes your Life so burthensome to you , you would provoke me to a Quarrel , in hopes either to slip thro' my Lungs into my Estate , or to get yourself run thro' the Guts , to put an end to your Pain : (VANBR-E3-P1,49.337) But I will disappoint you in both your Designs ; (VANBR-E3-P1,49.338) far with the Temper of a Philasapher , and the Discretion of a Statesman - I will go to the Play with my Sword in my Scabbard . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.339) Exit Lord Fop. (VANBR-E3-P1,49.340) Y. Fash. Soh . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.341) Farewel , Snuff-Box . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.342) And now , Conscience , I defie thee . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.343) Lory . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.344) Enter Lory . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.345) Lo. Sir . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.346) Y. Fash. $Here $'s {TEXT:Here's} rare News , Lory : (VANBR-E3-P1,49.347) his Lordship has given me a Pill has purg'd off all my Scruples . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.348) Lo. Then my $Heart $'s {TEXT:Heart's} at ease again : (VANBR-E3-P1,49.349) For I have been in a lamentable fright , Sir , ever since your Conscience had the Impudence to intrude into your Company . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.350) Y. Fash. Be at peace ; (VANBR-E3-P1,49.351) it will come there no more : (VANBR-E3-P1,49.352) My Brother has given it a wring by the Nose , (VANBR-E3-P1,49.353) and I have kick'd it down Stairs . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.354) So run away to the Inn ; (VANBR-E3-P1,49.355) get the Horses ready quickly , (VANBR-E3-P1,49.356) and bring 'em to old Coupler 's , without a moment's delay . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.357) Lo. Then , Sir , you are going strait about the Fortune . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.358) Y. Fash. I am ; (VANBR-E3-P1,49.359) away ; (VANBR-E3-P1,49.360) fly , Lory . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.361) Lo. The happiest Day I ever saw . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.362) $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} upon the Wing already . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.363) Exeunt several ways . (VANBR-E3-P1,49.364) SCENE II , (VANBR-E3-P1,50.367) A GARDEN . (VANBR-E3-P1,50.368) Enter Loveless and Servant . (VANBR-E3-P1,50.370) Lov. Is my Wife within ? (VANBR-E3-P1,50.371) Ser. No , Sir , she has been gone out this half hour . (VANBR-E3-P1,50.372) Lov. $'T $is {TEXT:'Tis} well ; (VANBR-E3-P1,50.373) leave me . (VANBR-E3-P1,50.374) Solus . {COM:verse_omitted} What I would do for one , is demonstration of my Love ; (VANBR-E3-P1,50.375) And if $I $'d {TEXT:I'd} do as much for t'other : it there is Demonstration of my Friendship - (VANBR-E3-P1,51.377) Ay - it must be so . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.378) I find $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} very much her Friend . - (VANBR-E3-P1,51.379) Yet let me ask myself one puzzling Question more : (VANBR-E3-P1,51.380) Whence springs this mighty Friendship all at once ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.381) For our Acquaintance is of a later Date . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.382) Now $Friendship $'s {TEXT:Friendship's} said to be a Plant of tedious Growth ; its Root compos'd of tender Fibres , nice in their Taste , cautious in spreading , check'd with the least Corruption in the Soil ; (VANBR-E3-P1,51.383) long e'er it take , and longer still e'er it appear to do so : (VANBR-E3-P1,51.384) whilst mine is in a moment shot so high , and fix'd so fast , it seems beyond the Power of Storms to shake it . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.385) I doubt it thrives too fast . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.386) Musing . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.387) Enter Berinthia . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.388) - Ha , she here ! - (VANBR-E3-P1,51.389) Nay , then take heed my Heart , (VANBR-E3-P1,51.390) for there are Dangers towards . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.391) Ber. What makes you look so thoughtful , Sir ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.392) I hope you are not ill ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.393) Lov. I was debating , Madam , whether I was so or not ; (VANBR-E3-P1,51.394) and that was it which made me look so thoughtful . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.395) Ber. Is it then so hard a matter to decide ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.396) I thought all People had been acquainted with their own Bodies , tho' few People know their own Minds . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.397) Lov. What if the Distemper , I suspect , be in the Mind ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.398) Ber. Why , then $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} undertake to prescribe you a Cure . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.399) Lov. Alas , you undertake you know not what . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.400) Ber. So far at least then allow me to be a Physician . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.401) Lov. Nay , $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} allow you so yet farther : (VANBR-E3-P1,51.402) For I have reason to believe , shou'd I put myself into your hands , you wou'd increase my Distemper . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.403) Ber. Perhaps I might have Reasons from the Colledge not to be too quick in your Cure ; (VANBR-E3-P1,51.404) but $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} possible I might find ways to give you often Ease , Sir . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.405) Lov. Were I but sure of that , $I $'d {TEXT:I'd} quickly lay my Case before you . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.406) Ber. Whether you are sure of it or no , what risque do you run in trying ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.407) Lov. O , a very great one . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.408) Ber. How ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.409) Lov. You might betray my Distemper to my Wife . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.410) Ber. And so lose all my Practice . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.411) Lov. Will you then keep my Secret ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.412) Ber. I will , if it $do $n't {TEXT:don't} burst me . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.413) Lov. Swear . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.414) Ber. I do . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.415) Lov. By what ? (VANBR-E3-P1,51.416) Ber. By Woman . (VANBR-E3-P1,51.417) Lov. $That $'s {TEXT:That's} swearing by my Deity . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.419) Do it by your own , (VANBR-E3-P1,52.420) or I $shall $n't {TEXT:shan't} believe you . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.421) Ber. By Man , then . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.422) Lov. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} satisfy'd . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.423) Now hear my Symptoms , (VANBR-E3-P1,52.424) and give me your Advice . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.425) {COM:verse_omitted} What think you of these Symptoms , pray ? (VANBR-E3-P1,52.426) Ber. Feverish every one of 'em . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.427) But what Relief pray did your Wife afford you ? (VANBR-E3-P1,52.428) Lov. Why , instantly she let me Blood ; which for the present much asswag'd my Flame . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.429) But when I saw you , out it burst again , (VANBR-E3-P1,52.430) and rag'd with greater fury than before . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.431) Nay , since you now appear , $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} so encreas'd , that in a moment if you do not help me , I shall , whilst you look on , consume to Ashes . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.432) Taking hold of her Hand . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.433) Ber. breaking from him . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.434) O Lard , let me go : (VANBR-E3-P1,52.435) $'T $is {TEXT:'Tis} the Plague , (VANBR-E3-P1,52.436) and we shall all be infected . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.437) Lov. catching her in his Arms , and kissing her . Then $we $'ll {TEXT:we'll} dye together , my Charming Angel . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.438) Ber. O Ged - the $Devil $'s {TEXT:Devil's} in you . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.439) Lard , let me go , (VANBR-E3-P1,52.440) $here $'s {TEXT:here's} some body coming . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.441) Enter Servant . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.442) Serv. Sir , my $Lady $'s {TEXT:Lady's} come home , (VANBR-E3-P1,52.443) and desires to speak with you : (VANBR-E3-P1,52.444) $She $'s {TEXT:She's} in her Chamber . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.445) Lov. Tell her $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} coming . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.446) Exit Serv. (VANBR-E3-P1,52.447) To Ber. (VANBR-E3-P1,52.448) But before I go , one Glass of Nectar more to Drink her Health . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.449) Ber. Stand off , (VANBR-E3-P1,52.450) or I shall hate you , by Heavens . (VANBR-E3-P1,52.451) Lov. kissing her . In Matters of Love , a Woman's Oath is no more to be minded than a Man's . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.453) Ber. Um - (VANBR-E3-P1,53.454) Enter Worthy . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.455) Wor. Ha ! $What $'s {TEXT:What's} here ? (VANBR-E3-P1,53.456) my old Mistress , (VANBR-E3-P1,53.457) and so close , I'faith ! (VANBR-E3-P1,53.458) I wou'd not spoil her sport for the Universe . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.459) He retires . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.460) Ber. O Ged - Now do I pray to Heaven , Exit Loveless running . with all my Heart and Soul , that the Devil in Hell may take me , if ever - I was better pleas'd in my Life - (VANBR-E3-P1,53.461) This Man has bewitch'd me , (VANBR-E3-P1,53.462) $that $'s {TEXT:that's} certain . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.463) Sighing . Well , I am condemn'd ; (VANBR-E3-P1,53.464) but thanks to Heaven I feel myself each Moment more and more prepar'd for my Execution - Nay , to that degree , I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} perceive I have the least fear of Dying . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.465) No , I find , let the - Executioner be but a Man , (VANBR-E3-P1,53.466) and $there $'s {TEXT:there's} nothing will suffer with more Resolution than a Woman . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.467) Well , I never had but one Intrigue yet : (VANBR-E3-P1,53.468) But I confess I long to have another . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.469) Pray Heaven it end as the first did tho' , that we may both grow weary at a time ; (VANBR-E3-P1,53.470) for $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} a Melancholy thing for Lovers to outlive one another . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.471) Enter Worthy . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.472) Wor. aside . This $Discovery $'s {TEXT:Discovery's} a lucky one , (VANBR-E3-P1,53.473) I hope to make a happy use on't . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.474) That Gentlewoman there is no Fool ; (VANBR-E3-P1,53.475) so I shall be able to make her understand her Interest . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.476) To Ber. (VANBR-E3-P1,53.477) Your Servant , Madam ; (VANBR-E3-P1,53.478) I need not ask you how you do , you have got so good a Colour . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.479) Ber. No better than I us'd to have , I suppose . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.480) Wor. A little more Blood in your Cheeks . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.481) Ber. The $Weather $'s {TEXT:Weather's} hot . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.482) Wor. If it were not , a Woman may have a Colour . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.483) Ber. What do you mean by that ? (VANBR-E3-P1,53.484) Wor. Nothing . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.485) Ber. Why do you smile then ? (VANBR-E3-P1,53.486) Wor. Because the $Weather $'s {TEXT:Weather's} hot . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.487) Ber. $You $'ll {TEXT:You'll} never leave Roguing , I see that . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.488) Wor. putting his Finger to his Nose . $You $'ll {TEXT:You'll} never leave - I see that . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.489) Ber. Well , I $can $n't {TEXT:can't} imagine what you drive at . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.490) Pray tell me what you mean ? (VANBR-E3-P1,53.491) Wor. Do you tell me ; (VANBR-E3-P1,53.492) $it $'s {TEXT:it's} the same thing . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.493) Ber. I $can $n't {TEXT:can't} . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.494) Wor. Guess ! (VANBR-E3-P1,53.495) Ber. I shall guess wrong . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.496) Wor. Indeed you $wo $n't {TEXT:won't} . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.497) Ber. Psha ! (VANBR-E3-P1,53.498) either tell , (VANBR-E3-P1,53.499) or let it alone . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.500) Wor. Nay , rather than let it alone , I will tell . (VANBR-E3-P1,53.501) But first I must put you in mind , That after what has past 'twixt you and I , very few things ought to be Secrets between us . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.502) Ber. Why what Secrets do we hide ? (VANBR-E3-P1,54.503) I know of none . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.504) Wor. Yes , there are two ; (VANBR-E3-P1,54.505) one I have hid from you , (VANBR-E3-P1,54.506) and t'other you wou'd hide from me . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.507) You are fond of Loveless , which I have discover'd ; (VANBR-E3-P1,54.508) and I am fond of his Wife - Ber. Which I have discover'd . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.509) Wor. Very well , now I confess your Discovery to be true : (VANBR-E3-P1,54.510) What do you say to mine ? (VANBR-E3-P1,54.511) Ber. Why , I confess - I wou'd swear $'t $were {TEXT:'twere} false , if I thought you were Fool enough to believe me . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.512) Wor. Now am I almost in Love with you again . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.513) Nay , I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} know but I might be quite so , had I made one short Campaign with Amanda . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.514) Therefore , if you find $'t $would {TEXT:'twou'd} tickle your Vanity , to bring me down once more to your Lure , e'en help me quickly to dispatch her business , that I may have nothing else to do , but to apply myself to yours . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.515) Ber. Do you then think , Sir , I am old enough to be a Bawd ? (VANBR-E3-P1,54.516) Wor. No , but I think you are wise enough to - (VANBR-E3-P1,54.517) Ber. To do what ? (VANBR-E3-P1,54.518) Wor. To hoodwink Amanda with a Gallant , that she $may $n't {TEXT:mayn't} see who is her Husband's Mistress . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.519) Ber. aside . He has reason : (VANBR-E3-P1,54.520) The $Hint $'s {TEXT:Hint's} a good one . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.521) Wor. Well , Madam , what think you on't ? (VANBR-E3-P1,54.522) Ber. I think you are so much a deeper Politician in these Affairs than I am , that I ought to have a very great regard to your Advice . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.523) Wor. Then give me leave to put you in mind , that the most easie , safe , and pleasant Situation for your own Amour , is the House in which you now are ; provided you keep Amanda from any sort of Suspicion . That the way to do that , is to engage her in an Intrigue of her own , making yourself her Confident . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.524) And the way to bring her to Intrigue , is to make her jealous of her Husband in a wrong place ; which the more you foment , the less $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} be suspected . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.525) This is my Scheme , in short ; which if you follow as you shou'd do my dear Berinthia we may all four pass the Winter very pleasantly . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.526) Ber. Well , I could be glad to have no body's Sins to answer for but my own . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.527) But where there is a necessity - (VANBR-E3-P1,54.528) Wor. Right ! (VANBR-E3-P1,54.529) as you say , where there is a necessity , a Christian is bound to help his Neighbour . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.530) So good Berinthia , lose no time , (VANBR-E3-P1,54.531) but let us begin the Dance as fast as we can . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.532) Ber. Not till the Fiddles are in tune , pray , Sir . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.533) Your Lady's Strings will be very apt to fly , I can tell you that , if they are wound up too hastily . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.534) But if $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} have patience to screw them to their pitch by degrees , I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} doubt but she may endure to be play'd upon . (VANBR-E3-P1,54.535) Wor. Ay , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.537) and will make admirable Musick too , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.538) or $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} mistaken ; (VANBR-E3-P1,55.539) but have you had no private Closet Discourse with her yet about Males and Females , and so forth , which may give you hopes in her Constitution ; (VANBR-E3-P1,55.540) for I know her Morals are the Devil against us . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.541) Ber. I have had so much Discourse with her , that I believe were she once cur'd of her fondness to her Husband , the Fortress of her Vertue wou'd not be so impregnable as the fancies . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.542) Wor. What ? (VANBR-E3-P1,55.543) she runs , $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} warrant you , into that common Mistake of Fond Wives , who conclude themselves Vertuous , because they can refuse a Man they $do $n't {TEXT:don't} like , when they have got one they do . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.544) Ber. True , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.545) and therefore I think $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} a presumptuous thing in a Woman to assume the Name of Vertuous , till she has heartily hated her Husband , and been soundly in love with somebody else . Whom if she has withstood - then - much good may it do her . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.546) Wor. Well , so much for her Vertue . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.547) Now , one word of her Inclinations , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.548) and every one to their Post . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.549) What Opinion do you find she has of me ? (VANBR-E3-P1,55.550) Ber. What you cou'd wish ; (VANBR-E3-P1,55.551) she thinks you handsome and discreet . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.552) Wor. Good , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.553) $that $'s {TEXT:that's} thinking half Seas over . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.554) One Tide more brings us into Port . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.555) Ber. Perhaps it may , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.556) tho' still remember , $there $'s {TEXT:there's} a difficult Bar to pass . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.557) Wor. I know there is , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.558) but I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} question I shall get well over it , by the help of such a Pilot . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.559) Ber. You may depend upon your Pilot , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.560) $she $'ll {TEXT:she'll} do the best she can ; (VANBR-E3-P1,55.561) so weigh Anchor , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.562) and be gone as soon as you please . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.563) Wor. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} under Sail already . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.564) Adieu . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.565) Exit Wor. (VANBR-E3-P1,55.566) Ber. Bon voyage . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.567) Sola . So , here 's fine Work . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.568) What a business have I undertaken ? (VANBR-E3-P1,55.569) $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} a very pretty Gentlewoman truly ; (VANBR-E3-P1,55.570) but there was no avoiding it : (VANBR-E3-P1,55.571) $He $'d {TEXT:He'd} have ruin'd me , if I had refus'd him . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.572) Besides , Faith , I begin to fancy there may be as much pleasure in carrying on another Bodies Intriegue , as one's own . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.573) This at least is certain , (VANBR-E3-P1,55.574) it exercises almost all the entertaining Faculties of a Woman . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.575) For $there $'s {TEXT:there's} employment for Hypocrisie , Invention , Deceit , Flattery , Mischief , and Lying . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.576) Enter Amanda , her Woman following her . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.577) Wom. If you please , Madam , only to say , whither $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} have me to buy 'em or not ? (VANBR-E3-P1,55.578) Aman. Yes , no , go fiddle ; (VANBR-E3-P1,55.579) I care not what you do : (VANBR-E3-P1,55.580) $Pray $thee {TEXT:Prithee} leave me . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.581) Wom. I have done . (VANBR-E3-P1,55.582) Exit Wom. (VANBR-E3-P1,55.583) Ber. What in the Name of Jove 's the matter with you ? (VANBR-E3-P1,55.584) Aman. The matter , (VANBR-E3-P1,56.586) Berinthia , $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} almost mad , (VANBR-E3-P1,56.587) $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} plagu'd to death . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.588) Ber. Who is it that plagues you ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.589) Aman. Who do you think shou'd plague a Wife , but her Husband ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.590) Ber. O ho , is it come to that ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.591) We shall have you wish your self a Widow by and by . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.592) Aman. Wou'd I were any thing but what I am ; (VANBR-E3-P1,56.593) A base ungrateful Man , after what I have done for him , to use me thus ! (VANBR-E3-P1,56.594) Ber. What , he has been Ogling now , $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} warrant you ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.595) Aman. Yes , he has been Ogling . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.596) Ber. And so you are jealous ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.597) Is that all ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.598) Aman. That all ! (VANBR-E3-P1,56.599) Is jealousie then nothing ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.600) Ber. It shou'd be nothing , if I were in your Case . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.601) Aman. Why , what wou'd you do ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.602) Ber. $I $'d {TEXT:I'd} cure myself . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.603) Aman. How ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.604) Ber. Let Blood in the Fond Vein : (VANBR-E3-P1,56.605) Care as little for my Husband , as he did for me . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.606) Aman. That would not stap his course . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.607) Ber. Nor nothing else , when the $Wind $'s {TEXT:Wind's} in the warm Corner . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.608) Look you , Amanda , you may build Castles in the Air , and Fume , and Fret , and grow Thin and Lean , and Pale and Ugly , if you please . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.609) But I tell you , no Man worth having , is true to his Wife , (VANBR-E3-P1,56.610) or can be true to his Wife , (VANBR-E3-P1,56.611) or ever was , (VANBR-E3-P1,56.612) or ever will be so . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.613) Aman. Do you then really think $he $'s {TEXT:he's} false to me ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.614) for I did but suspect him . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.615) Ber. Think so ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.616) I know $he $'s {TEXT:he's} so . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.617) Aman. Is it possible ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.618) Pray tell me what you know . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.619) Ber. $Do $n't {TEXT:Don't} press me then to name Names ; (VANBR-E3-P1,56.620) for that I have sworn I $wo $n't {TEXT:won't} do . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.621) Aman. Well , I $wo $n't {TEXT:won't} ; (VANBR-E3-P1,56.622) but let me know all you can without Perjury . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.623) Ber. $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} let you know enough to prevent any wise Woman's dying of the Pip ; (VANBR-E3-P1,56.624) and I hope $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} pluck up your Spirits , and shew upon occasion , you can be as good a Wife as the best of 'em . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.625) Aman. Well , what a Woman can do $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} endeavour . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.626) Ber. O , a Woman can do a great deal , if once she sets her mind to it . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.627) Therefore pray $do $n't {TEXT:don't} stand trifling any longer , and teasing yourself with this and that , and your Love and your Vertue , and I know not what . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.628) But resolve to hold up your Head , get a Tiptoe , and look over 'em all ; (VANBR-E3-P1,56.629) for to my certain knowledge your Husband is a Pickering elsewhere . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.630) Aman. You are sure on't ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.631) Ber. Positively , he fell in Love at the Play . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.632) Aman. Right , the very same ; (VANBR-E3-P1,56.633) do you know the ugly thing ? (VANBR-E3-P1,56.634) Ber. Yes , I know her well enough ; (VANBR-E3-P1,56.635) but $she $'s {TEXT:she's} no such ugly thing , neither . (VANBR-E3-P1,56.636) Aman. Is she very handsome ? (VANBR-E3-P1,57.638) Ber. Truly I think so . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.639) Aman. Hey ho . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.640) Ber. What do you sigh for now ? (VANBR-E3-P1,57.641) Aman. Oh my Heart . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.642) Ber. (VANBR-E3-P1,57.643) aside . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.644) Only the Pangs of Nature ; (VANBR-E3-P1,57.645) $she $'s {TEXT:she's} in Labour of her Love ; (VANBR-E3-P1,57.646) Heaven send her a quick Delivery , (VANBR-E3-P1,57.647) $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} sure she has a good Midwife . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.648) Aman. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} very , ill , (VANBR-E3-P1,57.649) I must go to my Chamber . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.650) Dear Berinthia , $do $n't {TEXT:don't} leave me a moment . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.651) Ber. No , $do $n't {TEXT:don't} fear . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.652) Aside . $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} see you safe brought to Bed , $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} warrant you . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.653) Exeunt , Amanda leaning upon Berinthia . (VANBR-E3-P1,57.654) {COM:insert_helsinki_sample_2} SCENE II . Loveless's Lodgings . (VANBR-E3-P1,65.658) Enter Amanda and Berinthia . (VANBR-E3-P1,65.660) {COM:verse_omitted} Aman. Well , now Berinthia , $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} at leisure to hear what $'t $was {TEXT:'twas} you had to say to me . (VANBR-E3-P1,65.661) What I had to say , was only to Eccho the Sighs and Groans of a dying lover . (VANBR-E3-P1,65.662) Aman. Phu , will you never learn to talk in earnest of any thing ? (VANBR-E3-P1,65.663) Ber. Why this shall be in earnest , if you please ; (VANBR-E3-P1,65.664) for my part , I only tell you matter of fact , you make it which way you like best ; (VANBR-E3-P1,65.665) but if $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} follow the Women of the Town , $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} take it both ways ; (VANBR-E3-P1,65.666) for when a Man offers himself to one of them , first she takes him in jest , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.667) and then she takes him in earnest . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.668) Aman. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} sure $there $'s {TEXT:there's} so much jest and earnest in what you say to me , I scarce know how to take it ; (VANBR-E3-P1,66.669) but I think you have bewitched me , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.670) for I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} find it possible to be angry with you , say-2 what you will . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.671) Ber. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} very glad to hear it , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.672) for I have no mind to quarrel with you , for more Reasons than $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} brag of ; (VANBR-E3-P1,66.673) but quarrel or not , smile or frown , I must tell you what I have suffer'd upon your account . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.674) Aman. Upon my account ? (VANBR-E3-P1,66.675) Ber. Yes , upon yours ; (VANBR-E3-P1,66.676) I have been forc'd to sit still and hear you commended for two hours together , without one Complement to my self ; (VANBR-E3-P1,66.677) now $do $n't {TEXT:don't} you think a Woman has a blessed time of that ? (VANBR-E3-P1,66.678) Aman. Alas ! (VANBR-E3-P1,66.679) I shoud'd have been unconcern'd at it ; (VANBR-E3-P1,66.680) I never knew where the Pleasure lay of being prais'd by the Men : (VANBR-E3-P1,66.681) but pray who was this that commended me so ? (VANBR-E3-P1,66.682) Ber. One you have a moral aversion to , Mr. Worthy : (VANBR-E3-P1,66.683) he us'd you like a Text , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.684) he took you all to pieces , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.685) but spoke so learnedly upon every Point , one might see the Spirit of the Church was in him ; (VANBR-E3-P1,66.686) if you are a Woman , $you $'d {TEXT:you'd} have been in an Extasie to have heard how feelingly he handled your Hair , your Eyes , your Nose , your Mouth , your Teeth , your Tongue , your Chin , your Neck , and so forth . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.687) Thus he Preach'd for an hour , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.688) but when he came to use an Application , he observ'd that all these without a Gallant were nothing - (VANBR-E3-P1,66.689) Now consider of what has been said , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.690) and Heaven give you Grace to put it in practice . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.691) Aman. Alas ! (VANBR-E3-P1,66.692) Berinthia , did I incline to a gallant , which you know I do not do you think a Man so nice as he , cou'd have the least concern for such a plain unpolisht thing as I am ? (VANBR-E3-P1,66.693) It is impossible ! (VANBR-E3-P1,66.694) Ber. Now have you a great mind to put me upon commending you . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.695) Aman. Indeed that was not my design . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.696) Ber. Nay , if it were , $it $'s {TEXT:it's} all one , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.697) for I $wo $n't {TEXT:won't} $do $'t {TEXT:do't} , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.698) $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} leave that to your Looking-glass . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.699) But to shew you I have some good Nature left , $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} commend him , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.700) and may be that may do as well . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.701) Aman. You have a great mind to perswade me I am in Love with him . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.702) Ber. I have a great mind to perswade you , you $do $n't {TEXT:don't} know what you are in love with . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.703) Aman. I am sure I am not in love with him , nor never shall be , (VANBR-E3-P1,66.704) so let that pass ; (VANBR-E3-P1,66.705) but you were saying something you wou'd commend him for . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.706) Ber. Oh $you $'d {TEXT:you'd} be glad to hear a good Character of him however . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.707) Aman. Psha . (VANBR-E3-P1,66.708) Ber. Psha - Well , $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} a foolish undertaking for Women in these kind of Matters , to pretend to deceive one another - (VANBR-E3-P1,66.709) Have I not been bred a Woman as well as you ? (VANBR-E3-P1,66.710) Aman. What then ? (VANBR-E3-P1,66.711) Ber. Why then I understand my Trade so well , that when ever I am told of a Man I like , I cry , Psha ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.713) but that I may spare you the pains of putting me a second time in mind to commend him , $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} proceed , and give you this account of him : That tho' $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} possible he may have had Women with as good Faces as your Ladyship's no Discredit to it neither yet you must know your cautious Behaviour , with that reserve in your Humour , has given him his Death's wound ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.714) he mortally hates a Coquett ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.715) he says $'t $is {TEXT:'tis} impossible to love where we $can $not {TEXT:cannot} esteem ; and that no Woman can be esteem'd by a Man who has sense , if she makes her self cheap in the Eye of a Fool . That Pride to a Woman , is as necessary as Humility to a Divine ; and that far-fetch'd , and dear bought , is Meat for Gentlemen , as well as for Ladies - In short , that every Woman who has Beauty , may set a price upon her self , and that by under-selling the Market , they ruin the Trade . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.716) This is his Doctrine , (VANBR-E3-P1,67.717) how do you like it ? (VANBR-E3-P1,67.718) Aman. So well that , since I never intend to have a Gallant for my self , if I were to recommend one to a Friend , he shou'd be the Man . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.719) Enter Worthy . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.720) Bless me ! (VANBR-E3-P1,67.721) $he $'s {TEXT:he's} here ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.722) pray Heaven he $did $n't {TEXT:didn't} hear me . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.723) Ber. If he did , it $wo $n't {TEXT:won't} hurt your Reputation ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.724) your Thoughts are as safe in his Heart , as in your own . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.725) Wor. I venture in at an unseasonable time of Night , Ladies ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.726) I hope if I am troublesome , $you $'ll {TEXT:you'll} use the same freedom in turning me out again . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.727) Aman. I believe it $can $n't {TEXT:can't} be late , (VANBR-E3-P1,67.728) for Mr. Loveless is not come home yet , (VANBR-E3-P1,67.729) and he usually keeps good hours . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.730) Wor. Madam , $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} afraid $he $'ll {TEXT:he'll} transgress a little to Night ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.731) for he told me about half an hour ago , he was going to sup with some Company , he doubted would keep him out 'till three or four a Clock in the Morning , (VANBR-E3-P1,67.732) and desir'd I would let my Servant acquaint you with it , that you might not expect him ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.733) but my $Fellow $'s {TEXT:Fellow's} a Blunder-head ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.734) so lest he should make some mistake , I thought it my Duty to deliver the message my self . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.735) Aman. $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} very sorry he shou'd give you that trouble , Sir . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.736) But - (VANBR-E3-P1,67.737) Ber. But since he has , will you give me leave , Madam , to keep him to play at Ombre with us ? (VANBR-E3-P1,67.738) Aman. Cousin , you know you command my House . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.739) Wor. to Ber. And , Madam , you know you command me , tho' $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} a very wretched Gamester . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.740) Ber. O you play well enough to lose your Money , (VANBR-E3-P1,67.741) and $that $'s {TEXT:that's} all the Ladies require ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.742) so without any more Ceremony , let us go into the next Room , and call for the Cards . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.743) Aman. With all my heart . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.744) Exit . Wor. leading Aman. (VANBR-E3-P1,67.745) Ber. sola . Well , how this Business will end , Heaven knows ; (VANBR-E3-P1,67.746) but she seems to me to be in as fair a way - as a Boy is to be a Rogue , when $he $'s {TEXT:he's} put Clerk to an Attorney . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.747) Exit Berinthia . (VANBR-E3-P1,67.748) SCENE III , BERINTHIA'S CHAMBER . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.751) Enter Loveless cautiously in the dark . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.753) Lov. So , thus far $all $'s {TEXT:all's} well . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.754) $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} got into her Bed-Chamber , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.755) and I think nobody has perceiv'd me steal into the House ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.756) my Wife $do $n't {TEXT:don't} expect me home 'till four a Clock ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.757) so if Berinthia comes to Bed by eleven , I shall have a Chace of five Hours ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.758) let me see , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.759) where shall I hide myself ? (VANBR-E3-P1,68.760) Under her bed ? (VANBR-E3-P1,68.761) No ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.762) we shall have her Maid searching there for something or other ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.763) her $Closet $'s {TEXT:Closet's} a better place , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.764) and I have a Master Key will open it ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.765) $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} e'en in there , and attack her just when she comes to her Prayers , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.766) $that $'s {TEXT:that's} the most like to prove her critical Minute , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.767) for then the Devil will be there to assist me . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.768) He opens the Closet , goes in , and shuts the door after him . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.769) Ber. Well , sure I am the best Natur'd Woman in the World . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.770) I that love Cards so well there is but one thing upon Earth I love better have pretended Letters to write , to give my Friends - a` Tate a` Tate ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.771) however , $I $'m {TEXT:I'm} innocent , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.772) for Picquet is the Game I set 'em to ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.773) at her own peril be it , if she ventures to play with him at any other . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.774) But now what shall I do with my self ? (VANBR-E3-P1,68.775) I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} know how in the World to pass my time ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.776) wou'd Loveless were here to badiner a little ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.777) well , $he $'s {TEXT:he's} a Charming Fellow , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.778) I $do $n't {TEXT:don't} wonder his $Wife $'s {TEXT:Wife's} so fond of him ; (VANBR-E3-P1,68.779) what if I shou'd sit down and think of him till I fall asleep , and dream of the Lord knows what ? (VANBR-E3-P1,68.780) O , but then if I shou'd dream we were married , I shou'd be frightned out of my Wits . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.781) Seeing a Book . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.782) $What $'s {TEXT:What's} this Book ? (VANBR-E3-P1,68.783) I think I had best go read . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.784) O Splenatique ! (VANBR-E3-P1,68.785) $it $'s {TEXT:it's} a Sermon : (VANBR-E3-P1,68.786) well , $I $'ll {TEXT:I'll} go into my Closet , and read the Plotting Sisters . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.787) She opens the Closet , sees Loveless , and shrieks out (VANBR-E3-P1,68.788) O Lord , a Ghost , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.789) a Ghost , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.790) a Ghost , (VANBR-E3-P1,68.791) a Ghost . (VANBR-E3-P1,68.792)